Friends, Gooners, football fans, lend me your ears;
I come to bury Wenger, not to praise him;
The evil that men do lives after them,
The good is oft interred with their bones,
So let it be with Wenger…The noble Mainstream Media
Hath told you Wenger was not ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Wenger answered it …
Here, under leave of the Mainstream Media and the rest,
For Mainstream Media is made of honourable men;
So are they all (journos, bloggers and podcasters); all honorable men.
Come I to speak in Wenger’s funeral…
He was like a friend and mentor; faithful and just to me:
But the Mainstream Media says he lacked ambition;
And the Mainstream Media are all honorable men….
He hath brought many trophies to Arsenal,
Whose glories did the general coffers fill:
Did this Wenger seem not ambitious?
When the gooners have cried, Arsene hath wept:
Surely his non-ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet the Mainstream Media say he was not ambitious enough;
And the Mainstream Media is made of honourable men.
You all did see that during the barren years after building the new stadium
He was often offered bigger jobs at bigger clubs,
Which over and over he did refuse; was this loyalty or lack of ambition?
Yet the Mainstream Media says he lacked ambition;
And, sure, they are all honourable men.
I speak not to disprove what the Mainstream Media spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love him once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then to mourn for him?
O judgement! thou art fled to brutish beasts and to the Mainstream Media,
And men have lost their reason…. Bear with me;
My heart is in the coffin there with Wenger,
And I must pause till it come back to me.
Shotta’s heart was in the coffin with Wenger but has now completed his passage through the seven stages of grief and looks forward to the reign of the King being followed by the rule of the Prince, el capitan, Mikel Arteta. All who agree, say Aye!














