I made good use of a football free weekend. Or at least I tried to. Mother wanted a lift over the bridge to the land of dragons and close harmony singing, the home of Newport County and a world famous dyke. I thought to myself this sounds like a chance to walk abroad with my trusty Fujifilm and capture the beauty of the Angiddy Valley. A place once full of fire and steam and the toiling of men making wire from iron bars. By hand. Sat, if the helpful information plaque on the wall of the car park is to be believed, on swings.
That my plans went awry was largely due to the weather. No sooner had I slithered down a leaf strewn slope and set my tripod on the banks of the fast flowing river than the heavens opened and I was obliged to scamper for cover. The only place of shelter near at hand being the car, I sat and steamed and for want of a better distraction tuned in the radio to the good old BBC.
The first thing to issue forth from the speakers was news of the death of Jimmy Hill. A difficult man to warm to he was nonetheless a big fixture in my childhood football world. I suppose people told me about his work in scrapping the maximum wage and his career as a wing-half but I won’t pretend to you that I knew anything about these things. He was simply a face on the television. It seems from the eulogies flowing since Saturday that he did an awful lot for and to the game we all love but there is one aspect with which he is credited that should see people dancing on his grave with burning pitchforks.
Jimmy Hill, we are led to believe, invented the ‘panel of experts’. The television punditry which so blights the game and ruins our enjoyment of televised matches started with this man. May Satan have some suitable punishment lined up for him. Personally I always struggled not to slip into Bruce Forsyth while doing my Jimmy Hill in the playground and similarly confused him with the king who lost his head to Cromwell in history lessons. Otherwise he was, along with Moore, Coleman, Davis and the radio giants Butler and Jones, the voice of football during my younger years and a little piece of my past just died with him.
The other big talking point on Radio 5 as I listened to the Welsh rain battering the lid of the Skoda was the odious ex-manager of a west London club. I seldom ever listen to or watch any football related broadcast in English any more. The ill informed, illiterate, moronic and crowd bating level to which the journalism has sunken usually has me lunging for the off switch before my blood pressure reaches dangerous levels. Leaving the prating to filter through the door speakers and do battle with the rain turned out to be an instructive exercise.
I’d often wondered why fans feel the need to talk with such faux authority about situations, the facts of which they cannot possibly possess. Why people queue up to pontificate about what this player said or did to his team mates and manager in the changing room or on the training ground. Who is the unsettling, malicious influence in the squad and who the manager favours, who he dislikes.
No supporter is privy to such private conversations and thoughts and yet people cannot wait to share their wisdom on these facts despite there being no facts and precious little wisdom. Well now I know. They are aping the ill informed gibberish vomited into their cars and homes by broadcasters most of whom seemed to me to be doing a passable impression of Alan Partridge. Worse, they appear to believe they are taking part in some meaningful national debate when they tell us who said and did what to who and why it means they should be dropped or the board should resign or the technical director never be allowed to negotiate a transfer fee ever again.
The inarticulate buffoon presenting the segment to which I subjected myself was almost shouting with childish and transparently false emotion on the subject of the ex-manager of the west London club, “Show the man some respect!” he cawed, stupidly and repeatedly, apparently suffused with rage at some apparatchik on the club’s in house TV channel not mentioning the individual by name. Which is odd really when you think about it as the only thing anyone knows for an absolute certainty is the individual in question deserved no respect having so often acted with none of it himself.
Nobody has a clue whether the players wanted him gone or were trying or not. No one can see into their hearts or their minds and anything you read or write on the subject is guesswork, speculation and fantasy. Whereas we all know for a fact that the man was a graceless oaf with no respect for his betters and a complete inability to manage a football club unless everything was going his way. We know these things because we’d seen the evidence with our own eyes time and again. Yet some poor souls in replica blue kits ruined the family’s only decent bed sheet, took time out from their week to learn to write and scrawled messages of hatred towards their own players. These they took to the match so they could wave them in the face of a hungry media and all because of the swirl of lies and speculation with which the modern fan surrounds him and herself.
Don’t think I’m avoiding the subject of this evening’s match. Everything I’ve said about the fans and their take on the tale of the ex-manager of the west London club applies to our great club. Just because we have a more illustrious history and are led by a man of class, style, grace and intelligence doesn’t mean our fan base doesn’t also pick over the bones of the graveyard of common sense that is the British sports media. Our fans too regurgitate the entirely fictitious or perhaps occasionally purely coincidentally true nonsense they hear and read as if it was known fact and then pontificate upon it.
I think the lesson we can all take from the debacle at the west London club and the runaway success of Leicester City is just how fragile and elusive a sprite is confidence. You may recall me telling you of an injury I suffered falling from my mountain bike. I am only now getting back into my stride and just yesterday morning approached a simple jump with such a tense lack of confidence that I fluffed my lines and nearly came a cropper again. Two minutes later I took the same obstacle at a canter and flew over it with ease. My technique was the same in every respect, physically I approached the jump in identical fashion the only difference was I was relaxed and confident the second time. Why? How did it happen? I have no clue.
Remember how the Invincible’s form fell away after being dethroned by the machinations of Mike Riley and his master Ferguson in that travesty at Old Trafford? Once their intangible sense of invulnerability had gone the players seemed to lose their way. I would suggest the same thing has probably happened to a certain west London club and once the playing staff finds its mojo again their results and performances will improve. I accept this almost certainly factual answer lacks drama and intrigue and as such is less appealing to the masses, but there you go.
Will our players have the relaxed ease and confidence in their own and each other’s abilities tonight? Even if they do will Man City allow them to express themselves? Both sides have shown vulnerability at times this season and both have shown strength and ability too. Separated by the most slender of margins it is a moot point who is in the better form. Taken over the last six games there’s only one point in it with both sides firing and misfiring in a very similar pattern. The possible significance is our home form is much better than their away form. However there is so much at stake for both sides one must imagine that Leicester’s favoured outcome of a draw has to be a distinct possibility.
It’s a massive game. The first biggy of the campaign really with the chance to establish ourselves and the Foxes in a small breakaway from the pack. Very small I know but in such an unpredictable topsy turvy season the team or teams who put the first decent run together and genuine daylight between themselves and the herd will fancy their chances of making that advantage stick.
A resurgence from the team from west London could easily rock the boat if they start taking points from those in and around the Europa league positions – they play the fifth, sixth and seventh placed teams over the Christmas and New Year period and might just help to create a gap between the leading clubs and those chasing.
Much will be revealed through the outcome of the frantic festive fixture fiasco. Talking of festivities, I am off out to the shops now to buy my wife a small token of my esteem. So wish me luck as I battle through the consumer hell that is the Shires Shopping Centre, Trowbridge. Last time I was there it was evacuated for a bomb scare but hopefully I’ll be back in one piece in time for kick off. If not enjoy the game without me and try not to get too nervous won’t you?

I have a liking for sitting in a car through a downpour while listening to inane chatter on the radio.
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Steve – me too. If it’s a particularly good bit of radio 4 I’ve been known to sit on the drive outside my house until the show has finished.
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Morning Steww.
For Radio 5 I tend to head towards the nearest cliff.
Good Job I never fill the tank more than half full.
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Stew: thanks so much for sharing these thoughts. Its interesting the way the informed pundit has taken such a hold, but slightly unfair I think to blame Jimmy Hill. There was a time when the only football on TV was Match of the Day on Saturday evening and The Big Match on Sunday afternoon (or Southern Soccer if you lived where I did). apart from the Cup final there was nothing much else. The papers, both national and local, would report the matches, but with nowhere like the amount of space allocated to football as it is now. And social media did not exist. As a result conversations about football tended to be with a few mates – and that was about it. The players too were both more and less distant. You might well meet a few in the local pubs and bookies (note casual stereotyping there) but only a very few had the kind of superstar status that the players of today have. The pundits back then had a useful role in educating the public and they certainly added a new dimension. Unfortunately, Topsy like, they grew.
Nowadays the fan is encouraged to believe he actually does know the players and the manager. If you want you can see them all the time. Stage managed interviews and TV appearances, constant press conferences, endless tweets all construct the images that so many come to believe. Its all a bit pornographic to be honest, for in the same way that the only thing you can’t buy in a sex shop is actual sex, the fan is further away than he has ever been.
Perceived bullshit used to be greeted by the words chin chin, accompanied by stroking of said feature made famous by Jimmy: it would somehow be appropriate to resurrect that in his honour, for I suspect he would have been appalled by some of the directions the game has taken over the last few years.
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Cheers Steww, the dogs cods!
Good to see Jones and Butler get a mention, its not ever quite been the same without them since. Odd to think it was on Radio two second half only. Peter Jones was especially superb, he never got over Hillsborough.That bloke was so articulate under such quick fire situations.
I always felt that Brian Moore was underrated, and was actually a better commentator than he got credit for.The fact he managed to sneak in the ” up for grabs” bit amazes me, I would have just said ” Thomas” then gone potty, as I did. No moment has ever been better than that. except maybe 79.”the ball floats over….” Peter Jones does the best commentary for that Final (” I dont believe it, nobody can believe it ..)
I can do a fairly Ok impression of all three of them. RIP them all as well as Jimmy, who as you said was an odd ball.But he certainly loved football.
Peter Jones was at Luton that night when Millwall kicked crap out of their dump and Jonesey gave a live commentary on some blokes coming to give him some agro “but Martin Chivers has seen them off”. A true profi!
COYG!
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All very fair comments FH. I would be shamed if I hadn’t been careful to use the words “with which he is credited” and “we are led to believe”. Phew.
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Bravo Stew. Don’t know how you do it but I sure am glad you do.
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You Stew and others are such lucky bastards. Due to my football addiction I frequently turn to digital radio for entertainment and I can testify that TalkSports is the personification of buffoons (presenters and callers) prating mindless football propaganda designed to stir emotions rather than a sober informed presentation and analysis of the facts. I spoke yesterday of zombiefication of the public by the mass media. Football has long gone down that road. How else could Talksport and their print/internet brethren succeed in vilification and demonization of Wenger who amidst all the madness has patiently build Arsenal into a major football force, inching us closer and closer to Man United and as Gazidis informed us eventually getting the club to the level of Bayern Munich.
As for the football tonight, I must confess I am quite nervous. In recent times our success against City has been built around matching if not dominating them in central midfield. Cazorla and Coquelin have been key to that success. I am not so sure Ramsey and Flamini can exert that control. While I would like us to win I am not that optimistic. A draw would satisfy me very nicely.
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Nice one steww. Fully agree with you on Chelsea – I think we will see their confidence return. And the less said about JH the better in my opinion.
But who was the world famous dyke? That’s what I want to know.
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Like shotta, I’m a bit nervous about tonight. There’s a lot riding on it, I guess. And City’s form has been so up and down. I just hope they play like they did against Liverpool, but we know they’re capable of better than that, especially with Silva back.
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I do look forward to match-day morning Stew and am never disappointed. All football fans I suspect will embrace the experience of sitting in a car, in some remote spot, the windows steamed up, the weather lashing down, as the radio wheezed and crackles out the commentary of a game. The signal fades then surges, the crowds roars – what does it MEAN ! – total incomprehension.
But there are worse experiences;
I may have bored you with this story before but bear with me on behalf of those who have not. Many years ago, in the mid 1980s I was in a very very remote spot and after a terrible morning out of doors got into my basha early Saturday afternoon, finally dry, finally warm.
The BBC World Service linked me to the UK, Lily Bolero, SportsWorld, Bryon Butler from St James’ Park bringing us the Newcastle Arsenal game. Amidst the hell of earth of damp windswept misery I heard our lads pressing the Georgie horde, 0-0, then we scored, 0-1, the home side equalized, it was end to end, end to end – 20 minutes to go it could go either way ……………………………!!!
And then the BBC announcer in perfectly modulated tones announced we would be leaving St James Park in order to hear commentary from today’s National Sheepdog Trials from Penrith
There then followed 45 minutes of whistling ( which presumably the sheepdogs ‘got’), and Cumbrian farmers shouting “Cooooom Byeeee”
I kid you not.
Anyway as a final quip enjoy the sobbing Leicester fan I mentioned on Saturday night on 606 – particularly where he says that his son “looked me in the eye”;
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p03cl1cc
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In case it is on anyone’s mind we won 2-1 in the end
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Somewhere near Port Stanley Andy?
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Somewhere near (banned penguin)
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Seems my recovery is not going as well as I had hoped.
I might go missing again so don’t worry. I’ll be back.
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For any who have not read but are near a news stand get hold of today’sTimes where Henry Winter has a two page interview with Mesut. It is really good, a complete contrast to the self destructive Jeremy Kyle show from the Bridge andTrafford Park.
Because it is behind the paywall here is an excerpt;
“My parents gave me the right principles, so I didn’t get carried away,’’ Özil says. “They always told me to be down to earth, that I was not special. They told me always to be nice to people. They said: ‘You maybe have the ability to be a football star but it doesn’t make you better than your brother and sisters. Respect each other. Be together’. That’s how I grew up. It’s a cultural thing.”
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Well Steww I think it is wrong of you to lay the blame at Jimmy Hills door, for what passes as a football panel nowadays, that these panels now by and large comprise of idiot ex players with little or no real understanding of the game, who just want to prattle out soundbites and show their complete lack of knowledge of the actual rules of the game, is not down to Jimmy Hill, after all the panels he was first involved in comprised of World Cup winners, League winners, top managers. For example the BBC coverage of the 1974 World Cup was anchored by Frank Bough and the panelists included Jimmy Hill, Bobby Charlton, Frank McLintock, Laurie McMenemy and Joe Mercer
in 78 BBC had Frank Bough and Jimmy Hill, studio summarisers included Lawrie McMenenmy, Jock Stein, Billy Bremner, John Bond and the 1974 World Cup final referee Jack Taylor
Compare those examples to panels now with Alan Shearer, Phil Neville, Michael Owen etc. It is the lack of vision among the producers or those that hire the staff that is to blame, not the man who helped start panels decades ago. You say yourself “he ill informed, illiterate, moronic and crowd bating level to which the journalism has sunken “, shows that you understand that the level of journalism and punditry is the problem, not the notion of it.
Maybe its just modern society that is to blame, maybe we get what the masses want, the latest celeb pundit is what we get, maybe its what satisfies the masses. Here in Ireland our football coverage, in fact generally our sports coverage, has been fantastic where expert panels are concerned, our GAA coverage still remains at the highest standard, but sadly our football coverage is clearly heading down the same route as you are getting in the UK. By that I mean we are seeing less and less of the likes of Johnny Giles and Liam Brady, and are now seeing the likes of Richie Saddler and Kenny Cunningham and Ronny Whelan. We also now copy the example of UK TV who in recent years bring in “foreign” pundits, it seems once SKY or BBC came up with the idea of Ruud Guillit all other channels tripped over themselves to follow suit and we’ve seen such disasters as Adebayor on BBC, and Ossie Ardiles(aba da ba da da da you know aba da) on Irish TV, who also have on a regular basis Didi Hamann, who only needs a monocle and he could be the stereotypical B&W film German general. Its the brand name that counts and not the actual quality, as far as football panels are now concerned. No deep thought on the subject is wanted or provided, and as others have already pointed out, isn’t that they way it is with all things now in the media.
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on the subject of Jimmy Hill, I seen someone refer to him as a racist, can anyone clear this up, was there an incident.
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Arsenal Under-21s’ starting XI v Aston Villa U21’s: Huddart, Moore, M.Bola, Kamara, Bielik, Pleguezuelo, Nelson, Bennacer, Mavididi, Hinds, Crowley
substitutes: Sheaf, Macey, Malen, Robinson, Agyei-Tabi
game kicked off at 1, and AFC are losing 1-0
looking at that squad it looks like Reine-adelaid and Iwobi might be with the first team squad for the City game.
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Just popped in to calm my nerves before tonights game…. nothing like a bit of PA to calm the sphincter.

Hey George, hope you get back to normal soon mate.
Steww, I always enjoy your posts, interesting and humorous…. but somewhat long.
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News reports suggest Van Gall Has been give just 1 more game to turn things around for Man Utd.
Shame that game is away, at Stoke, on Boxing Day, against Sparky’s team.
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Too late strew my nerves were shot to pieces a lon time ago during the build up for the fixture.
But that was still an interesting and enjoyable article, thanks!
The way the Arsenal started the Utd home game was the perfect illustration of that alchemical elixir of relaxation, confidence and supreme skill.
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According to one tweep it seems I am like one of those Playstation-XBox Football Manager types by suggesting Wenger could surprise us by starting Alexis with Walcott as CF. Apparently it is ludicrous for Wenger to start Alexis, the same manager who rushed him back to the 1st team after his post Copa de Americas summer break. Isn’t it the same Alexis we see in recent pictures from Arsenals training ground rearing to go. The fact that it is ludicrous to some of us should make it even more of a surprise to City who I am sure have prepared all week to gang up on Giroud and make it difficult for him to hold up up the ball or to do his flicks and layoffs to surrounding players.
Admittedly, I am speculating, but I wouldn’t be surprised if that sly old fox Wenger repeats his tactic vs Villa in the cup final and set up with a fast, mobile front three to give the City team real concern about our speed in attacks. Sagna, Mangala and Yaya Toure will not be happy chasing our attackers for the 1st 60 or so mins.
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Negative bit: A bit miffed with the club having 4 different covers for today’s programme to be honest. Not for me as I don’t always get one. But for collectors, folk with kids who want one of each etc… Grrrrrrr.
Positive bit : not at work today and sod it! Can’t wait any longer so setting off now. Bet the bloody pub is selling that beer stuff too! How can I not have one or two? No doubt they’ll have different types and I’ll have to get them all. Woohooo
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the U21’s lost 1-2, Malen drew AFC level on 81 minutes from a penalty, but on 86 minutes Villa scored a winner.
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Too long eh? You wouldn’t have enjoyed the unedited piece then.
Andy Nic – that was a glorious anecdote. I assumed it was going to cut to the shipping forecast but the sheepdog trials. You made me guffaw.
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Eduardo –
In 2004, Hill defended fellow pundit Ron Atkinson over racist comments he had made which were broadcast in the Middle East. Hill was asked whether he thought Atkinson should resign over the comments, to which he said it was the “language of the football field”. Hill went on to say: “In that context, you wouldn’t think that words like nigger were particularly insulting: it would be funny. Without meaning to insult any black men, it’s us having fun … I mean, nigger is black – so we have jokes where we call them niggers because they’re black. Why should that be any more of an offence than someone calling me chinny?”.
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Bit of topic but does anyone know if it is possible to watch and appreciate the new Star Wars film without any knowledge of the originals?
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Oh wow!
How do you write like this week in and week out. Sometimes I wonder
Thanks so much!
I think we will win today. Our midfield holds the key..i think our defense will handle their strikers and our strikers to puncture their defense more than once.
3-1 lets say then?
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Just gathering from the comments..Please get well soon PG, I hope whatever is ailing you sir will go away after seeing Arsenal play the beautiful game today.
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Thanks Steww.
Whatever innovations or whatever’s Jimmy Hill introduced, there’s one chat of his that has remained in my mind forever- ever.
I can’t remember who he was chatting with but the conversation was about whether “stanchion” is pronounced ‘stan-chen’ or ‘storn-chen’!
RIP Jimmy Hill. He really had a life full of football.
I’d like to point out it’s South West London, that place. (Despite being on the northern side of the river).
The very fact most go along with “it’s the player’s fault”, leads me to believe that’s not the case. (Plus a load of stuff I’ll not bore you with here).
Come on Arsenal. Bring your best game tonight.
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FH – don’t know having not seen it nor the original for thirty odd years but I suspect you’d miss a lot of references. Whether that would spoil it who can say?
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FH- from what I can gather, no.
Pretty sad reading Jimmy Hills comments…I had no idea he had come out with that.
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Mills – it is sad but no matter how reprehensible we find it people from a different generation grew up with a different use of language. My wife’s grandmother who is fast approaching 100 years old and has always seemed to me a tolerant and kind woman, never utters one word that could be considered prejudiced against anyone for sexual orientation or race or anything was shocked to find that we didn’t regard ‘nigger’ as synonymous with ‘black’.
Once we’d explained why we felt like we did she agreed with us and forbade to use the word but said it had been a simple description where she’d grown up and not an insult in any way.
Different times, different life experiences. Of course Jimmy Hill and Ron Atkinson could have taken the trouble to find out why such language might be offensive.
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Context if not quite all does play a significant role. The author is dead and all that. My twitter line has young blacks (or at least wannabes ) for whom the use of nigger is almost compulsory. And the odd retweet from an AFC supporter of the EDL would use it quite quite differently.
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You’ll be fine with Star Wars FH.
JJ the director is heavy perhaps too heavy with the nostalgia but it’s a bright fast paced movie overall. Don’t blink, and enjoy!
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Alexis didn’t make it.
Come on the gunners
Arsenal!
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Steww, I think what baffled me was that (once I checked it on wiki) was that it was in 2004, (rather than 1972 etc) and also read that he’d been a Trade Union leader( so Im assuming he was left leaning at least). I suppose I expected more from him ( which is a bit naive on my part) especially his being so close to all aspects of the game, and Jimmy did seem to care a fair bit about all aspects of the game. Its conjecture on my part but in 2004 both he and Ron would have been well aware that the term was reprehensible.
But good points, I too grew up in the 70s and with old Victorian Grandparents and recall well that time and those people. Two Tone was one cool breath of fresh air.
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Arsenal team to play Manchester City: Cech, Bellerin, Mertesacker, Koscielny, Monreal, Flamini, Ramsey, Campbell, Ozil, Walcott, Giroud
Arsenal substitutes: Ospina, Chambers, Gabriel, Gibbs, Reine-Adelaide, Iwobi, Oxlade-Chamberlain
Read more at http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/20151221/team-news-wenger-names-unchanged-team#ycSz68mptmyTpKDx.99
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brilliant again Steww, condence the form down to three and were in front. I agree tonight will be close however if we play to our best the spoils will be ours.
the football grinch now departed the beautiful game can flourish another thing lost on those moronic fans. COYG
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COYG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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in my part of ireland when someone was referred to as being black or being a black bastard it meant being of the opposite religion, or being really staunch opposition of your religion, and yes many see no problem with describing a black man as a nigger, in nearly all cases no offence is meant by it
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this fucking ref has forgotten to bring his cards with him, city doing a lot of tactical fouling and not getting booked for it.
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finally he has found his card, city are rotational fouling.
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When he does book someone it’s the least dirty player on their team. Weird.
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Excellent break from City, unlucky not to score lovely touch in midfield to set up the chance.
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get ffffffffffffffffffaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaackin in tttttttttttthhhheeeeerreee!!!
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Walcottttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt 1-0
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Oh my Theo! All started from a wonderful pass by Kos.
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Wonder who had the assist. Oh…
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