The last time I had anything even remotely resembling a proper job, and we are going back into the halcyon mists here, there was a rhythm, a recognisable pattern to my work year. I was shackled in the engine room of academia, not teaching of course – they don’t allow inarticulate, uneducated oafs from the labouring classes to stand in front of young people and tell them how the world works – God forbid.
Only the most servile and robotic clones capable of adhering to the strictest codes and never risking an original thought are considered fit to be teachers these days. Which is why it’s a good job young people have men like Arsène Wenger in their world. If you want someone to look up to, look no further I say. In a life of insane rush and avaricious clambering having a man capable of maintaining a calm equilibrium in the face of abuse, malicious misrepresentation and an all round lack of appreciation can only provide a positive counter balance.
When I was working at the college each term had a particular character and I evolved different strategies to get through the individual challenges posed by them all. November was a bastard. The novelty of the new academic year had long since evaporated, the clocks had reverted to proper time and darkness was gathering all around. Christmas was too far away and too expensive to contemplate and the true misery and futility of their surroundings had begun to sink into the students resulting in the predictable but nonetheless unpleasant behaviour patterns which inevitably ended at my door.
So I joined Nanowrimo. Because I would be writing against a deadline and under pressure every day the month simply flew by. Before I knew it I would be opening my advent calendar and contemplating two weeks off in the dysfunctional bosom of my family.
For some reason known to the universe but not to me I approach the November fixture list in a similarly uncertain state of mind. Looking back over the years the results simply do not bear witness to any annual meltdown in the eleventh month. This time last season wasn’t the most fun an Arsenal supporter can have, but generally we’ve won more than we’ve lost so I can’t explain the trepidation.
It may simply be that the bleakness of my outlook infects my thoughts where football is concerned, and let’s face it, we all look at the world through our own distorted lens. Those who think a player is poor will, in their minds, amplify his errors and overlook his positive contribution to the team, and we all do the reverse for the players we love.
In reality then November should hold no more fears than any other month. It isn’t the time when Arsenal traditionally ‘melt down’ as the vacuous lickspittles of the press would have us believe. It simply means another series of fixtures for the players to navigate, all of which are significant regardless of the opposition.
We kick off this mini campaign with the usual worries about injuries. Our last match saw us robbed of Lucas, Monreal, Theo and Santi while Danny is not even projected to start his rehabilitation into the first team until next month. Olivier and Aaron are only ready for a few minutes from the subs bench and so we can expect a few players to be putting in quite a shift before November is out.
One thing the boss could do is rest people for cup games where he deems the opposition pose a significantly lesser threat. Do Ludogorets fall into this category? I’m not so sure. In one respect the argument could be put forward that as we comprehensively gubbed them less than a fortnight ago then yes they are a decidedly weaker team than, say, the Spurs side we will face on Sunday. Results seldom tell the full story though do they? For much of the first half the Bulgarians played some neat football and only the ever alert David Ospina kept us from falling behind. In their own stadium and with a point to prove to their supporters they may not be the pushovers that six nil suggests.
I am of course falling into an obvious trap. That of looking ahead beyond the match in question, contemplating the fixture list for the month ahead and ignoring the age old mantra of one game at a time. Fortunately enough I’m not the one who matters here. The man in charge who’s decisions actually have an impact will be fully focussed on tonight’s fixture and whatever team he sends out will, I’m sure, be properly prepared and more than capable of getting the result.
Right, I have to find two thousand words for the first page of this year’s novel so you’re going to be on short commons today and for the rest of November I’m afraid. Unfortunately I am not one of nature’s planners. I sit down each year with an empty page in front of me and an equally empty head. They call it writing by the seat of your pants. I hate that I’m like this, it makes the world a terrifying place to navigate and I wish I could spend the preceding eleven months planning but as with every blog I write for you I’m afraid I just have to start scribbling and hope something comes out of it.
If you’re travelling to Razgrad tonight then I wish you a safe journey, if not I’ll see you here from seven forty five. Or eight forty five as my body clock still deems it to be. Either way I’m as excited for another European night as every other supporter – whatever time of day or year it happens to be.
Positively Arsenal 
9:45pm here in South Africa Stew. A time I’m sure our Eastern and friends down under would take any time, so I won’t complain.
Great preview. I too don’t buy into this “annual November melt-down” bs. If any results don’t go our way I tend to look at them in isolation. However we are approaching the period toward the next FIFA break. We didn’t enjoy the same trajectory as last time leading up to the Chelsea fixture. Something I’m sure the Boss is aware of and that’s why I’m expecting us to field a relatively strong 11 to fine tune for the NLD, at least in attack.
Enjoy the game tonight Positivistas. COYG.
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Speaking as one of those “most servile and robotic clones” all I can say is that your writing teaches more than I can say. A novel in a month? Wow – and good luck.
And good luck too to whomsoever Arsene trusts to thwart the Bulgars this evening. I’m hoping for a classic one nil to the Arsenal, with the Corporal netting the winner.
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Well done Steww… Impeccable writing as per usual… No matter how humble you try to be as per usual…
Many of us do not say this often enough, but you are much appreciated as your fellow contributors andy, shotta and co and your effort to keep the blog fresh and running is not at all taken for granted.
Arsenal has the chance to top the group for a change,,, trust we will take it…
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Tim – I will lay any odds you choose that you are one of those who are anything but servile and robotic. My swipe was at the bureaucratic straight jacket into which the teaching profession is being squeezed and not at my many friends who battle to still be inspirational teachers.
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Good morning Stew – a damp and windy morning in Norfolk and roll on 7.45 for some footballing cheer. Like you I anticipate a rigorous workout from the Bulgars who must fancy their chances to finish above Basel.
The Times this morning in its pre match review sets out our various number November hiccups going back to Robin van Persie’s sending off at the Britannia eight years ago (!)
The punch line is however that in the four seasons of Arsene’s reign we have been top of the PL at the end of November we have never gone on to lift the trophy.
All about timing that surge for the line really.
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Morning Andy. Back from beautiful Dorset then? Still. That’s the word for North Somerset this morning. It’s all very still. Mist shrouded, muffled and mild. Some more words for it.
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Stew, as Boyd almost said “I’ve accused you of a lot of things, being inarticulate, ain’t one of them”
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I had a lovely drive from Poole to Newton Abbot yesterday morning, rolling countryside, misty in the valleys and bright sunshine on the tops, trees golden. Never taken that route before. What a day to be alive!
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Good morning folks
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There seems to be more than the average crowd going to this away game tonight.
Mel O’ Reilly
Calamity Jane
we may get some live updates.
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Another little gem, steww.
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Following on from Shotta’s opus yesterday, here are the average monthly points obtained in the Premier League under Arsene.
Jan 1.89
Feb 1.97
Mar 2.18
Apr 2.09
May 1.95
Aug 1.88
Sept 2.14
Oct 2.15
Nov 1.59 <<<<———— [Beware the Ides of ……. November!!]
Dec 1.99
It is not just a statistical anomaly or glitch, as these averages have been taken over the years since the boss first joined us.
Bugger! Let's hope we break the trend and sail through November with all guns blazing and a ripe haul of points.
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Hi anicoll5.
I see you have already covered the idiosyncrasies of our November data. [Apologies]
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Not at all Henry – I stole my info from the inside pages of theTimes this morning.
This season the monthly figures are August = 1.33, September 3.0 and October 2.5.
Anything above 2 in November would do me nicely
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It is amazing the difference between a real writer and a scribbler. Steww you are the right-brained creative marvel of PA. You inspire us to look at football as an art and not just a weekly dick-swinging contest.
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As always Steww, thanks. Great article.
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Anything above 2 would do us all nicely, anicoll! Would mean two wins and a draw or three wins.
I’d say a win against Spurs puts us in a position where a draw at Old Trafford would be an excellent result and where a loss shouldn’t induce the ole despair. (But it’s Mou, so maybe I ask too much there)
Bournemouth are a better team than likes of West Brom, but I nearly always feel more confident about the result against non-bus-parkers.
That’s a 3-game month, I guess. Lose the first, and you’ve obviously got to be perfect to get your 2-point average; win and you’re in a cracking position for it.
Tonight is really one to test your pretend boss credentials honestly. Resting any of Kos, Sanchez, Ozil, Mustafi (in that order) is so bloody tempting, not just because of Saturday but because their schedule has been intense for weeks and will be in the weeks to come.
But…the opponents can’t be taken lightly, and to lose would turn the next one or two CL games into massive pressure situations with little or no scope for resting anyone.
Yikes. I guess I’d go for full team, bar the switch George has mentioned of Xhaka for Coquelin. But, damn…it could be so good for us if we could get any of those four a rest.
I suppose messing with the cb’s is too much of a gamble, so it’s just leaves Ozil and Sanchez. Ok, final answer, I’d start Sanchez on bench and if everything goes like a dream whip off Ozil for Ramsey as soon as possible (Kos for another cb if things go better than a dream)
We can be sure there are droves ready to blast the boss for rotating/not rotating depending on how things unfold
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Ah Steww has a knack to drag and Cajole the reader along with ever word.
Of course your dead right Steww most football myths are complete bollocks including the old take one game at a time and of course the equally brilliant it all equals out at the end of the season. While focus obviously has to be on the nearest fixture is there ever been a manager who didn’t look at several fixtures it’s why we have rotation.
The Bulgariians seemed to fade as the game went on last time so tonight I think we will need to once again weather an early storm but believe we have enough talent in the tank to bring back the all important 3 points (tonight is not about GD just points) COYG
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I thought that because of midweek Milk Cup exploits both Iwobi and the Ox looked tired by the end of their stints on Saturday, so I wouldn’t be expecting too much from them this evening. Xhaka I am sure will have a big role to play as will our irrepressible Egyptian. I can’t imagine Alexis not playing, but would be surprised if Giroud doesn’t start up front, with maybe a bit of a wild and unexpected card somewhere else.
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Breaking News!
I have changed my twitter handle to Shötta-For-86@shotta_gooner
Ha, Ha, Ha.
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Good read Steww but I always worry about you overdoing it on the writing front this time of year. And one of these days you are going to end up published, for sure. And then you’ll be right up against it.
Anyway, back to the football.
Like Sunderland away, A Bulgarian Team has as much banana skinning potential as the next ‘we ought to win by 4’ encounter. The home leg did just look as though they ran out of steam or was it out of spirit and if it was, who could blame them?
November IS a tricky month and it’s not just the averages that bear that point out; it’s surprisingly often the point when the hamstrings start to go and Lord knows what else. It’s the first really cold month of the London year so I’ve no idea if that has anything to do with it but by December we are, as often as not, staring down the barrel of a full(ish) treatment room and a long slog through to February, awaiting the return of the cavalry. And no, we are not imagining this.
I did read recently that Arsenal have installed a more conventional pitch up at London Colney to reduce the amount of player mileage expended on the concrete-like surface of the Emirates snooker table surface which they have also always had to hand for training on. It’s always been my contention that at least some of the injuries are related to the exceptionally hard surface of the home pitch so news of this new, softer, practice strip was more than little bit significant, to me.
Anyway, roll on tonight and then the tension really starts to build. But let’s not think about the next game ahead!
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Maybe you should have 86 as your avi Shotta?
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A; Maybe it should be simply Shötta86. What do you think?
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Sounds good; statistically sound handle which is appropriate.
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So good Steww.
I looked at the NaNoWriMo page. Very interesting. Boy, you have your work cut out, and good luck with it. Such a great idea.
Superb preview/writing.
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Shotta – made you one out of a Lee Scratch Perry pic
https://postimg.org/image/pofmpw8i7/
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Shotta86 it is Andrew. The change in avi is breaking my heart. Steww sent me a graphic of 86. I love that 1960s drawing of the original Rastaman by the famous Jamaican artist, Edna Manley. Actually she was English but married the founder of the anti-colonialist People’s National Party when he was student at Oxford in the 1930s.
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http://www.arsenal.com/match/report/1617/post/under-19/u-19s-ludogorets-1-1-arsenal-report
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tonight is the 4th round of CL group games and Irish TV – both TV3 on Tuesday’s and RTE on Wednesday’s – have so far not shown Arsenal, its been Barca v Celtic, Celtic v Man City, Barca v Man City and tonight its Monchengladbach v Celtic.
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Oliver Kay @OliverKayTimes 3h3 hours ago
Mourinho’s record since the start of last season:
26 Premier League matches;
8 wins;
6 draws;
12 defeats;
4 FA charges.
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PV4 taking digs at wenger again, what a prat he is. He acts like a love scorned teenager. Once again talking shite about AFC not having ex players employed at the club.
No wonder pep decided to bring in Arteta, and not hire Vieira as one of his assistants.
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Positively Arsenal @Blackburngeorge 22m22 minutes ago Blackburn, England
We should distinguish between Arsenal “legends” and “legendary players”
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seemingly we have Mark Clattenburg as ref v spurs
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oh god, oh god, spare a thought for the malcontents, just look at our line up tonight, they won’t know who to attack first, Ramsey, Giroud, Jenkinson, Ospina, Xhaka with Coquelin in CM or Alexis being moved out wide, or ox not starting, or Kos and Mustafi not being rested, oh god oh god oh god, they will have to just do with attacking Wenger for it all.
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just to point out that for the final group standings goal difference only comes into it if head to head is the same, for example, if us and PSG, as expected top the group on same points, goal difference will only come into play if our home game with PSG ends 1-1, any other result and it comes down to head to head, a 0-0 and we top the group, a 2-2 and PSG would top it. A win for either side and they would top the group.
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Positively Arsenal @Blackburngeorge 1m1 minute ago Blackburn, England
What if we are playing 442, with Ramsey RMF and Ozil LFM
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Wonderful stuff Master Steww and the photo wasn’t too bad either. your technique is reading Wengerball standards.
Stuart MacFarlane will be looking over his shoulder (at the shocking state of the visiting fans this coming Sunday, dodging coins etc.)
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< reaching
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If you churned out a paragraph on the gaffer perhaps you’d be able to then use someone else’s photographs (not that you would need to. Others without the or any talent might…) in order to publish another book and, well, to cash in. I mention no parasitical, hypocritical and disingenuous names. None! Not a squeak.
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–
Jenkinson getting his first start for his sexism stint after loans at AFC away in the CL
I’ll take that as a good omen (Munich!)
Come on the Gunners
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I’m going to be controversial. Ready? I don’t think Mesut has been at his best this season. I suspect we’ll see that change with Aaron back in the team. I think our Welsh wizard is more on his wavelength than other members of the squad.
Sorry Shotta no stats to back that up just pure gut feeling.
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‘Sexism’ from ‘second’?
I don’t understand computers.
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Ozil should have done better after a flowing move
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Almost an early goal for the flamboyant Welsh Wizard, Steww writing the above just in time!
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Wonderful break. Coquelin at the heart of it again
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Ffs mesut
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Fins – just lacked the technique of Koscielny on the overhead.
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Good covering from Jenko there
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