So here we are. About to bully off for the final chukka. The stage has been swept, the lights lit and the fat lady is preparing to gargle with her honey and lemon throat soother before the ultimate performance. Here we stand at the edge of the unknown about to witness the dénouement of what has surely been the most exciting season finale for many a year. Nothing, of course, can possibly match the Mickey Thomas moment (frankly I fail to see how anything ever will) but for sheer bloody determination to drag themselves back into contention this Arsenal squad has cemented its place in our hearts. They have given us thrills and spills and many a weak willed fan has bellyached but here they are in a three way fight, hoping for third but desperate to cement at least fourth.
Warren (a Liverpool supporting friend of mine) and I were chatting the other day about how massive and important an achievement a top four finish has become. We all remember not that long ago of course when his beloved side were breezily mentioned in the same breath as Chelsea, Manchester United and Manchester City as one of the big four. This despite the glaring fact that Arsenal generally finished above them and they were actually in the kind of situation that pundits and our own alleged supporters seem to think we are in. Wazza would love to see ‘pool fighting for a fourth place finish right now, and if they were he happily admitted all and sundry would see it as a major accomplishment. Remember Harry for Engerland? Remember the media furore surrounding the Spuds elevation to a team challenging for a top four placing? We both agreed it was funny how this target of a Champions League place is an enormously big deal, truly the mark of a fantastic manager and a great set of players. Oh, unless of course you happen to be Arsène Wenger and have done it every year for ever spending a mere fraction of that blown by all the others in the race. Warren could see it, you and I can see it but the football world that describes this as a remarkable feat for everyone else seems to see it as a failure for us.
Well yar boo sucks to the lot of them. It was a target, one of many, at the start of the season and it’s the last one left. Curiously it is a target which comes with a consolation prize. Unlike a runners up medal in a cup final the team to miss out today receives the opportunity to slum it in the Europa League, or Fairs Cup or whatever the hell they’re calling it these days. However, as Chris Tarrant has grown so fond of saying in his post Tiswas days, ” we don’t want to give you that!”. Because we cannot go into this game thinking of booby prizes or a season without the celebration of St Totts. Negative thinking will spoil your morning and ruin your enjoyment of the fun and games this afternoon. On that subject I’m intrigued to know how you all will play this one. I’m considering the split screen approach on my desktop pc with Arsenal v Barcodes full screen on one monitor and the Spuds match in a small window on the other. I could then keep half an eye on the Chavs game on my laptop. Or maybe I should just follow whoever the Chavs and Spuds are playing on Twitter for the day and thus keep up with their scores. The dilemma of the twenty first century armchair fan.
Reading that back, and thinking of Mickey Thomas and Liverpool, I realise just how long ago it was that I watched the remarkable scenes at Anfield that fateful year. Along with a group of like minded artistic friends (and a posse of more practical types we’d corralled for the purpose) we were organising a music festival in the small North Somerset town of Midsomer Norton. Yes they named that show after it, before you ask. Anyway on the Friday night with marquees erected and stages half built we had agreed to camp on the festival site as a kind of security detail and also as an outstanding opportunity to get utterly shitfaced in a field. But this particular bank holiday weekend of course was a little different from most. Not just because we were running an all day music and arts extravaganza on the Sunday but because the football season’s finale was, unusually, being broadcast live on television that very Friday evening. I watched it on a black and white portable , powered by a 12 volt car battery with a metal coat hanger as an aerial. In the middle of a field. Pretty spectacularly stoned and very much the worse for drink. As I said, how times have changed.
And so to today’s opponents. It’s probably a good plan to at least mention the match as this is a match-day preview. Newcastle have had an up-down time of late. Last year they were managed by the greatest manager who has ever lived as they briefly threatened to disturb the top four status quo. This year they are under the control of a sad hapless character, lying in thirteenth place and hoping to finish above the likes of Norwich and Stoke City. So goes the popular narrative. Actually as with all premier league sides (with the notable exception of Queens Park Rangers) they are a team highly motivated by vociferous partisan support, eager to impress in their last home game of the season and featuring some genuinely talented players. They’ve won two drawn two and lost two of their last six scoring four and conceding about a hundred and twenty goals. Roughly. So I think the best way to describe them right now is unpredictable. They can ship goals like a bow legged man trying to stop a pig in a passageway or they can grind out a result. I suppose we’ll know which Newcastle turned up by about six o’clock tonight.
When I hear Newcastle versus Arsenal only one name leaps immediately to mind. Supermac. Malcolm MacDonald. OK so that’s two names but you get my drift. Back when I was young enough and not driven to cynical despair by the transfer circus of these so called enlightened times, I would become genuinely excited by the arrivals of the likes of Alan Ball and Malcolm MacDonald. 
Exotic new faces from far away come to swell the ranks of my sticker collection. Malcolm came doon from the land of coal blackened faces, shipyards, Jimmy Nail and Lindisfarne in 1976, which was officially recorded as the year of the last ever British summer. He loved his time with us and when interviewed for Arsenal TVO was still visibly moved as he recalled the day the doctors informed him his Arsenal playing days were over. However, despite being a Londoner by birth, Supermac writes as if he’s a Geordie so maybe those were crocodile tears I saw welling in the corners of his eyes. Either way he has a timely warning for any complacent Gooners predicting an easy victory to match the six goal thumping Warren’s lot handed out on their recent visit to Tyneside. Writing in something called Chronicle Live he poo-poohs the idea that Newcastle have nothing to play for. In fact he comes up with the kind of stirring guff I might well be inclined to spew when describing our own glorious team. He says “My hope, the hope of every Geordie, is that, freed from pressure and worry, Newcastle go out and play football because, if they do, it will be a terrific match. Arsenal always play that way so we would have a spectacle on our hands.” and when asked if it’s true, as Pardew suggests that it doesn’t matter if Newcastle lose four nil because they now have nothing to play for, Macdonald nearly spits his false teeth into his Vimto crying “I’m not having it. Nothing at stake for United? Just their pride, their reputation. Just the need to repair the damage they have already done.” Well said Malcolm, now sit back down before you do yourself a mischief.
I am probably the only Arsenal supporter hoping that he is right. I don’t want them to play with one eye on the flip flops and the Timothy White’s sun cream. I want them to come out and make a game of it. I want open spaces for Theo to sprint into and if it means we have a few scares at the wrong end then so be it. We can take it. The nervous, nail biting buttock clenching is all part of the fun. Not, you understand, that I’d say no to the four nil of course. I just want the season to end on a fittingly exciting note.
How ever and wherever you are watching, it’s been a hell of a ride and I hope you enjoy this final go round before the roller coaster closes down for the summer. I’ve loved sharing the games here on Positively Arsenal in a properly passionate, supportive and intelligent environment, so thank you, and I hope you all enjoy the close season, whatever this afternoon may bring.
Positively Arsenal 
Good morning Steww
Thanks for that stirring piece…..I’m on edge…..I think I need to watch the game with good gooner company…..there’s just one other gooner I know here in Chesterfield…..he is a cool and calm chap….
Thanks to you and all the great chaps who set up Positively Arsenal….my spiritual home….it’s the place I run too, especially if somebody made me spit feathers….like Piers ‘fucking’ MORON….I was stupid enough to listen to his TalkShite interview….I could have chinned the bastard if he was in my presence……
Go on the Arsenal….
I believe we are in for great stuff ahead….
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Well written, Steww. I’m reminded of ZimPaul’s running metaphor with this last match.
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Sav – it’s like three athletes stretching for the tape and we’re waiting the results of the photo finish.
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GOYG!!! Don’t worry about that split screen fiasco mate, enjoy……….it’s in your hands & an opportunity I’m sure you guys will grab!!
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Superb piece Steww,
I hope the barcodes try to make a game of it too.
Theo needs to add a few more to his tally.
With handsome man back, I’m expecting a real cracker.
So proud of this team considering all they’ve been through.
Now to seal it off with a WIN and a big “stuff ya million quid in ya orifice Mike Ashley”…
COYG!!!!!!
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another great post stew and that ll do for me as the last preview of the season.
I think ill watch a stream either with the sound turned down or with a foreign commentator because its primarily about what we do. if we are leading by more than two goals or not winning I might then start looking at other mediums to see what’s going on elsewhere, hopefully I’ll just be able to enjoy our match and forget about everybody else.
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Great Stew and I expect a real contest this afternoon in all the games – bit of patience,bit of composure will win the race – keep 11 men on the pitch above all
Obviously I’d take 4-0
Just not at half time
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Fittingly brilliant final pre-match piece from our Master Contributor.
I did attempt to comment yesterday but it was lost in the wilds of the Internet – just to say how much I rated George’s article and in particular also, Fungunner’s remarks, following. Looking forward to a full-blown article from FG, btw, one day soon.
Working a half-day now but looking forward to joining everyone later for the coaster, roller or otherwise!
Have a great day one and all.
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HEAR HEAR STEWW
hopefully a good exciting game and 1•3 win for the ARSENAL. 6am I’ll be at the pub watching in the packed big room on big screen. Totts on much smaller tv on the right. Chelski likewise on the left. Here we go lads. LETS DO THIS..
UP THE GUNNERS OF ARSENAL!!!!!!
we love ya, we love ya, we love ya ,yes we do..
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I will be doing an”Arsene” and paying no heed to the Spurs game.
Mainly because I think they will win at a canter.
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And oh. Thanks to PA, PG , YOUR GOOD SELF and the other wonderful contributions from great writers such adi, AA ,B7 , FRANK AND B7 ETC. ETC.
Our home away from the nastiness of other blogspots that spew bullshivk and insanity.
Much success in the future. To PA & THE ARSENAL..
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George , di canio has said if Sunderland players do not give 150% he will keep them from their holidays for two weeks and send his fascist friends over to their homes for re educational talks. Benito di canio is trying to change their mentality..
Interestingly we will be facing the magpies fourth string goalie today. The bloke is almost 40 years old. Smiley face.
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Brilliant Steww (and the venerable George yesterday btw. Just been catching up..)
Nothing to add of any import whatsoever, so I’ll just say..
C’MON ARSENAL
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We will win, that is all.
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Stew you’re a masochistic nut case, but I love your balls to the wall style. Great read. This is it chaps. Our boys have this. One more game to behold and to relish with childish delight.
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I too wont be even checking the spuds game. I’ll watch us and us only. I’ll keep a little eye out to see Moyes getting a good send off winning his last everton game hooefully. Then he can become the biggest twat in the league.
Hat-trick for bac me thinks.
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You guys are chatting bollocks. As blindly optimistic as you must be at times like this, as a fan I will nervously check on the Spuds from time to time, just to confirm that the Little Corporal’s soldiers will fail him despite his bluster.
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first off my congratulations to brady george fungunner aman and steww for the last fantastic pieces and comments… ive been trying to say nothing till season ends..but i couldnt. your posts and ideas deserve praise.
“Warren could see it, you and I can see it but the football world that describes this as a remarkable feat for everyone else seems to see it as a failure for us.”
Newspapers aint selling as they used to. majority gets their news now from the internet. previously the newpspaper would compete with its frontpage to get your coin now since nobody bothers to see frontpages on the local newsagent they need to compete for your clicks. how do they do that if not by creating articles and headlines which aim at your curiocity and emotional reaction. truth goes out the window. noone cares about that. profit is what the newspaper/media outlet wants..i.e clicks, comments keeping you in their cyberspace. mocking arsenal for things that other teams/clubs are praised is a de facto strategy of the media to get the arsenal fans involved and CONSUME and why not, even create the imagination of a crisis to sell more and reach points of hysteria were actions need to be taken. a strange world is developing…in the shadows ..muahaha. scheming and plotting for the profit with complete disregard to truth balance or any ethic considerations. are they any different to trolls then? if there is one difference at all its that they are professionals and get paid to troll.
george i also believe in this difference of fans, id just say that as long as they show respect to wenger i dont really care if they are hooligans mass murderers thieves or chavs whatever. you could have a high profile city broker acting worse so for me its not social status, its about the mind the behaviour and the respect they show. there are hooligans who probably dont have the education of a morgan but have the respect for wenger and there are educated scum who attack wenger like a peasant mob. there are those who are honest and say i aint paying till he goes and there are those who pay and think that because they pay they can chop his head off too.
i read dc post to 7m… hahahaha ..i agree with dc about raising such a topic at the eve of an important fixture. who cares what usmanov does? in that comment section i noticed mikes post right before dc’s. so bloody true and something that though had crossed my mind in various versions i was never able to put it all in such a nice subtle order. oh yes someone paid dein 70 million and wants to make that back plus his profits. will he not create a fuss ? of course he will…dein fucked him got 70 million out of him and now alisher has a 29% in a club that makes profits but wont pay dividents and runs the risk of not being in the champions league next year and goodbye facebook gazprom and telecom satelite sponsors and interests ( usma’s side) ..muahaha…is part of usma’ investment being paid back all these years by darren’s palyer sales?
yes its a stretch and right out of game of thrones scenario but what if the late danny, kroenke pete and to a lesser extent arsene ( he bit the bullet big time) remained on course of self sustainability, sold stars etc to lock the russian in a position where the only thing he can do now after 5 years is sell? ..genius concept…
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and how could i forget.
Arsene, mon bruv, s’il vous plait …le arse de pardeau = grand canyon
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Great start to the day Steww.
I’m afraid if any of you are going to watch the game on sky they will be jumping around the grounds I when goals go in.
And we all have those little phones that can update the ‘as it stands’ table.
My best guess for us is 4-1, once we get the first the toons won’t put up much of a fight.( they save that for punching horses).
My worry is missing Arteta. We will be relying on Rambo and Jack to do a massive job in midfield. Will Wenger play it safe and play Coq ahead of Poldi?
Watching Sink the Bismark! On tv to get me in the mood. This time the BFG is on our side!
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Hunter, a few too many vino’s before I sent that off.
I’ve probably got myself struck off his Christmas card list.
The only one who can make the decision to take dividends out of the club is stan.
He can’t do that because technically AFC is still running at a small loss and secondly why would he give 30% of any such dividend to the fat Uzbek?
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fine with me DC didnt see anything wrong there. i laughed when i read the ” you cunt” so sure he can see the humour of it. intention is what matters.and yours were good. compared to what i say to various arsebloggers you were most kind.
thats true too…what dividents..arsenal, its been documented. makes profits due to wenger;s player sales, an unfortunate consequence of the rush to secure sponsorship during building our house.
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and if arteta dont play i dont think jack is the answer. i read somehwere he is up again for an operation..hmmmmm… aimar comes to mind..hope it aint the case.
im no manager, but id trust ramsey rosi and cazorla at midfield and play teho poldi giroud as the front three. then once we are 3-0 ahead take rosicky out for lecoq to enter and start kicking them “foreigners” whove come to ruin our league… 🙂
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h13 that would be my suggested line up too mate. Would have been a great game for coquelin.
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Hunter ,thats my pick also.Sibbs at LB
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I want to see Tommy V in Arteta’s role but I bet we’re all wrong and he picks Le Coq
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My comment in moderation. Hmmm.
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Stew and George, you make me (even more) proud to be a Gooner. Thank you for…. your writing, your views, your humour and your general loveliness. Yes even you George. Up The Arsenal.
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Spot on STEWW
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With Hatem Ben Arfa back in the Newcastle squad, I’d play Vermaelen in the middle in order to neutralize him.
I’ve been uneasy about this game all week. I hope the boys score a few quick goals and put it beyond Newcastle’s reach early.
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Good morning, from across the pond. I read Stew’s excellent piece about an hour ago, but needed coffee and some quiet before I tried to compose a response. It is quiet in the house right now. I haven’t even turned the TV on yet. The family has gone off to church, as you do on Sunday morning in the American South, so it’s just me and the dog. I’m quite sure I am at this moment the topic of conversation there, as my husband and daughter explain that the crazy woman has bailed this morning to watch some soccer game. (I told them all weeks ago that I wouldn’t be there today, but of course they will have forgotten, because none of this means anything to them!)
It’s funny for me to look back to August/September and think that I could nonchalantly record a Sunday match and watch whenever I got around to it. If I had to do that today, I would be spitting nails. It’s been an interesting 10 months for me. Made more interesting by having this place to come to, and you guys to chat with.
Right then, enough sentimentality, we have a game to win. And we will win it. The boys are up for it, and they’ll be ready. Up the Arsenal.
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Morning KW, enjoy the peace and quiet, I’m sure the family will offer a prayer for a good result today. They won’t want you suffering!
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DC, I thought I detected a little alcohol talking last night. Sounded a bit out of character for you! For what it’s worth, and it isn’t worth much, I thought Tim’s point was that people think Usmanov would be so much better than Silent Stan. But Usmanov has a history of doing the same things with his other holdings that they are worried about Stan doing at Arsenal. Making “the devil you know” argument, I guess. It was a continuation of a conversation that started last week on Twitter. Anyway, it doesn’t matter, now. Today is all that matters! Let’s do this thing.
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Right, Stew. More like they don’t want to suffer. Nobody wants Mom to be depressed.
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I am a lot more confident about winning with Arteta playing. The Spanish General is my Player Of The Season. We need his leadership and know-how today.
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Well exactly KW. Mum suffers everyone suffers
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Arteta is in the team.
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COYG
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Tiote is in Webb’s look after a thug program today. He’s been kicking the shit out of everyone in a red shirt and he still hasn’t had as much as a verbal warning.
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I have tried to read your post ,steww, but I am so nervous I can’t take it in. I will appreciate it if I am not crying too much. Either way, I will cry – happiness or misery.
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how are we doing? I am coming in at the halfway point
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Spuds fans livid because Garreth Bale the diver got booked for diving.
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At least we haven’t conceded….
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We’re doing alright, but we’re playing with the handbreak on, Fun. If we score, I have the feeling the flood gates will open answer will score enough to get us past Chelsea if it comes down to goal difference.
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Oh I hope so, G69 – I’m praying for Everton to hold out, though I can’t see Sunderland doing the same.
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Boscielny!!!
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How many vital goals has Koscielny scored for us now? He scored against Bayern, last season against WBA, etc. A rock at the back and always there to score an important goal. Probably the best defender we have had in the last 10 years.
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Yes!
“I wanna dance with Koscielny”
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Two more, please, boys, then I will stop hyperventilating.
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Is PA calm and composed unlike Twitter? Apparently Newcastle have no quality players and have no right to attack us.
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