Last time we spoke I was wondering whether or not I ought to watch the match. Could I release some kind of reverse jinx hoodoo and help Arsenal overcome Bayern by missing it? Well, by now, unless you’ve been held against your will in some remote Gulag you probably know the outcome. Thanks to me giving up on all forms of superstition and just watching the match we triumphed. We trounced them. We out thought them, out manoeuvred them and out foxed them. Thanks, as I say to my not paying any attention to any silly nonsense about lucky charms and rituals. I suppose Nacho Monreal can share in the credit with me. Perhaps Arsène Wenger too.
The rest of this week has passed in something of a haze. I’m still recuperating after my unplanned aerobatics while nominally out mountain biking. I made the mistake of assuming that as the agony had all but subsided I could come off my pain medication. Needless to say of course the only reason I wasn’t experiencing the full warp factor ten discomfort levels was due to the very course of physic from which I had so recently abstained.
Consequently by Thursday evening I could be found staggering about like a flayed man in a cactus patch howling for codeine. I have since scored some pills which have an effect similar to that of a marquee erector’s mallet to the base of the skull and while my pain threshold has been suitably raised my coherence levels are experiencing a severe dip in the market. Cognitive function is through the floor and there are no takers for reflexes nor conversational sparkle.
I mention all this simply by way of explanation in case you feel short changed with this morning’s offering. I find my analgesically addled concentration drifts from the matter in hand to other matters and even on occasions to other hands. The most cursory of glances over the preceding paragraphs is evidence of this. The only reason I haven’t drifted from the point of today’s duel with the blue half of Merseyside is that I haven’t even managed to as much as get to the point in the first place.
I’ll have a go and see how far I get. Normally, and I think normally is the word I want, it might be usually, generally, customarily or ordinarily, to be honest they are all reasonably synonymous with one another, either way in the usual run of things, at least as far as this season goes, we would expect to find ourselves intrigued. Intrigued that is to discover how the boys can respond after a Champion’s League let down, a cup calamity, a European setback. How, we cry, will the manager motivate his charges, lift their heads and inspire them to give of their best on resumption of their Premier League duties? I have to say Arsène has answered any doubters in the camp with some reasonably emphatic post Euro faux pas performances.
This time we face a different dilemma. Whereas after Olympiacos the lads would have slunk back to their digs, collars turned high, hat brims pulled low and hoped to get off the N41 for Crouch End Broadway without any of their fellow passengers recognising them, the post Bayern binge must have been at least a two day bender. I should imagine they all had to train in bin bags to sweat it out yesterday. How Arsène will pull his bleary eyed boys back into some semblance of order and persuade them that the party is over and they need to get back to work I do not know.
The visit of Everton is not to be taken lightly, and the eleven who start and the three who come on for the final chukka will need to be sober, present and correct today. One of them at least may well have been surreptitiously bunging his tequila shots into the potted plants after Tuesday night’s epic match. The hugely unwelcome injury to Aaron Ramsey opens a door to one of the second eleven as we used to call them.
I’m firmly in the Oxlade-Chamberlain camp as I feel his inclusion offers the least disruption to the other positions and partnerships on the pitch, he has played there before and while it is true bad lack and bad judgement have dogged the defensive side of his game I strongly suggest that a run of matches would be the best antidote, next that is to a couple of well taken goals. We know the boy has phenomenal talent and we know that were he to really catch fire then an attacking three of him, Theo and Sanchez would pour ice down the jerseys of the most resolute of defenders. When one adds the guile, class and abundant energy of Mesut Özil, the understanding between Santi and Francis Coquelin and two of the best fullbacks in the league, then even missing the man who I think of as our most vital cog we ought still to have enough about us to continue our fine run of results.
I haven’t mentioned how good Per, Kos and Petr Čech are because quite frankly that is like pointing out that the Himalayas are quite a long way above sea level or that the moon is made of cheese – some things are taken as red and do not need reiterating. Or even iterating in the first place. I confess where Čech is concerned I had been worried. When I heard we’d signed someone from The Bridge, the Stew Black lip was seen to curl of its own volition. It is hard for me to warm for men from that area of Fulham but of them all the former first choice between the sticks seemed the most likeable. Also the man is a drummer and as such I thought I ought to at least have sympathy for him. We bass players do an awful lot of good work in the community helping drummers to fit in with normal society, covering their mistakes on stage and showing them what the fork is for during meal breaks in recording sessions.
My worries were more to do with his age and ring rustiness. Was he replaced by Courtois for a reason? Were we getting ourselves a rusting, beaten up old hulk of a keeper trading upon his past glories or did he still have enough of the right stuff to provide the final piece in our defensive jigsaw? His early games saw my apprehension rise. Handling errors like that made by David Ospina are entirely understandable and eminently forgiveable. We are all taught on our mother’s knee that to err is human. The positional howlers Mr Čech made in his early appearances were far more troubling. These were the type of mistakes that you did not expect from a man of his experience. Can I just state for the record that any residual doubts doubts I may have still harboured evaporated like breath off a scalpel after Tuesday night. In fairness he’s been growing in stature in every game but on the occasions – the perhaps inevitable occasions – that Bayern broke through, the giant Czech was the final rock in their path, the one they simply could not overcome. He was so good I would say he almost rivalled Nacho as my man of the match. It appears that he just needed time to get into the swing again. As with medication so with goalies – I should learn to be more patient.
We are the team to beat at the moment, top of the form table with five wins in the previous six. In comparison, Everton’s form over a similar period sees them in eleventh place. Like us they have only lost one of their recent half dozen but have been picking up a lot more draws. One warning note – they are unbeaten away from home having won two and drawn two on the road this season while we have only won 50% of our home fixtures. Do not be surprised if we too need to be patient this afternoon. This is a team which must have honest hopes of travelling back up the M1 with at least a point in their pocket despite our blistering run of form.
How do we make sure that we keep the pressure on Man City? It depends on how Martinez decides to play it. If he wants to do to us what we did to Bayern then he had better hope his forwards are quick and accurate when they get their chances and his defence and midfield have the game of their lives. We will need to do what Bayern did only do it better. Win the ball back quickly, put them under steadily increasing pressure and wait to exploit the cracks as and when they appear. If Everton come out and try to go toe to toe with us then we need to give them a taste of the medicine which Man United found so unpalatable here a couple of weeks ago.
One of the biggest lies told to the gullible is that Arsène doesn’t do tactics. That’s like saying MPs don’t do expenses or Captain Birdseye doesn’t do breadcrumbs. It’s just baloney as we all know. His sides are intelligent enough and flexible enough to adapt to the strategy of their opponents, to implement a careful and rigid game plan or to improvise when the opportunity arises.
Who we’ll see replacing Aaron will have maybe less of an impact than the way Martinez men go about the quest for their draw. Can the fans be as intelligent and adaptable and show the necessary stoicism? That is down to the psychology of the individual. You and I will float through the game in a bubble of serenity, smiling sweetly at each impudent flick and indulgently forgiving the occasional misplaced pass. Or at least I shall – as long as these pills don’t lose their potency before half past five this evening. Which reminds me, it’s time I had another hit, so I’ll say adieu for now, I’m off to get the spoon and the rope and stick the Velvet Underground on my turntable. Man.
Positively Arsenal 
My routine of lying in bed on a football day until I’ve read your pre-game offering, seems to be doing the trick results wise at present, so I’m sticking to it.
Of course, you will be aware, Stew that deliberately NOT following routines is in itself as obsessional as following them – magical thinking is the term to search. Psychologists will bugger up any chance of rational thought if you let them.
Anyway, excellent stuff again, the drugs have given things a pleasant woolly and warm feeling for this slightly chilly October morn.
Cheers stew and all, UTA
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I too think Aaron is our most vital cog.I have to admit, his absence for 6 weeks worries me.
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After last week’s humbling by ManYoo I fancy Roberto will have given his boys the metaphoric rocket this week and they will come out to blast us in the first 15.
One eye will need to be on Mr Mason and a bit of effort in managing the match official competently, Naismith has a nasty habit of escaping Scot-free (!) for some kicks and elbows.
Draw their venom though and I fancy a smooth result.
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And I neglected to mention, what a wonderful blog.
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Nice one steww – “some things are taken as red” – like Arsenal shirts, you mean.
Wandering through the YouTube forest the other day, I stumbled across The Mothers of Invention and We’re Only In It For The Money. Nostalgia Row. Still brings a smile to my face from cover to content.
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I too think the Toffees will have something to prove today and we’ll need to be focused from the first whistle. If we do that, we’ll win it.
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Nothing wrong with your coherence levels Stew, it contains just the right dosage of sparkle to get our game faces on. Superb as usual.
Petr Čech has grown on all of us and that shouldn’t really be a surprise. The positive half of Arsenal’s support are known to give there 100% support to anyone with his signature on an Arsenal contract.
Ramsey will be missed, there’s no like-for-like replacement for him in the squad, politely put, the boy is a machine. Oxlade always knew his only chance of securing a first 11 berth was through an injury, hopefully he’ll grab the chance with both hands.
Everton are no chumps and we don’t know how much Tuesday’s party has taken out of the boys. This game might contain less fan fair, but I’ll remain positive it will end with Arsenal securing the 3 points. COYG
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Top draw stuff, Steww. I can only wonder if this was writing ‘under the influence’, I’d almost wish you’d remain consistently under. But the human in me wishes you a speedy recovery from your travails.
We could make a team of sorts, you know – me on piano, you on bass, and Petr on drums. Banned winky smiley
As for the matter at hand, the visit of the Toffees, I shall, to borrow your phrase, float through same bubble of serenity as you would albeit without the codeine, of course. And yes, enjoy the ride! That too!
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Clearly the codeine did the trick. After a bleary-eyed start eventually this blog weaved some pretty mazy football patterns. Hopefully our boys can replicate Steww’s fine efforts later today.
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I’ll have whatever Steww is having, please.
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Train full of Appy Ammers
Costa’s a popular bloke isn’t he ?
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Once awoken by a horrible dream at about 8 this morn, and having seen that Steww hadn’t bothered to get his post up by that time, I simply repaired back to bed.
As I lay there I couldn’t help feeling scared about the Mason, linesman, Taylor triumvirate of evil that lies ahead. Some of you will know the supposed thinking of PGMO following the Palace game.
Having now dared to get up, I’ve read all of the above – and feel I’ve now had my “suitable hit”.
Thank you Steww, all.
COYG
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Great fun Steww thanks, definitely more coherent then my usual morning hallucinations. You’re doing fine.
Arsène doesn’t do tactics?
Ridicule is the tribute paid to the genius by the mediocrities.
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Terrific stuff Stew.
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One thing that Young Pep has seen at AFC and tried to copy but apparently given up on in recent times was a ‘Big Lump’ option from within his squad.
Even though Adebayor came from Monaco with a reputation he wasn’t as expensive a punt as Ibrahimovic, heh. Ade was doing well before he fell off the wagon and still made the club a tidy profit even though he retired once he’d signed that contract at Abu Dhabi City.
At Munchen Pep let Mandzukic go who’d done well for them and bought in Lewandowski. Robert’s certainly a striker and as we saw against Ireland he can head the ball better then most but he’s not exactly the same type of forward as OG. Or Lukaku.
Giroud has proven to be much better, perhaps the best striker of his ken in the European game at the moment? Pellegrini who we note enjoys trading players with the Arsenal manager has kept a lump option in his squad to replace the departing Dzeko, and spent the same sum AFC spent on Sanchez bringing in Bony!
Looking at that you’d think that Giroud certainly appears to be the premier striker of his ilk. Benteke? Please. Mandzukic I guess under Heynckes was right up there too.
Today the Arsenal face a player who’ll want to join Giroud at the top of the tree, Lukaku.
There may be a PR drive to blow some smoke up Diego Costa’s arse by the awful sycophantic hacks in the meedjah, begging year pardon, but I thank the football gods that the special one replaced such potential with such shite. Bit like mata or de bruyne being replaced by the creaking F. Word and Willian. Sure, the Crap Costa may have “attitude” as the hacks are repeating like some kind of weird fascist propagandists on behalf of, well, of behalf of some corporatists/oligarchs/fascists, but as we all could see from our recent encounter against Gazprom, Lukaku is simply the better footballer (what was the Crap Costa who’s now been replaced by Moratta for Spain doing at the same age?). I hope Lukaku doesn’t get picked up by Young Pep.
He’ll be a tough test today for the Arsenal back line if he’s on song. If his team plays well a they did against Gazprom. Hopefully we’ll get to see Arsenal’s Big Lump show him how it’s done.
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“analgesically addled concentration” is something I coundn’t even spell (ive copied and pasted) under normal circumstances let alone under the influence however this blog was so good Steww I thinking of taking a few codine I have left from when I hurt my back falling down the stair.
Cech is getting bigger with every game and is now becoming a more Pat Jennings like signing. I still think Os is a good keeper and Szcz and Martinez are quality as well but Petre is definitly special. Matt Macey on the bench today who is also a good young keeper.
the toffees record against us might not be great but apart from the 7-0 the games are normally tight and we will have to be on our metal today and if it is the Ox playing as Rambo today then its a mature rather than flare performace will be needed.
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COYG
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Hopefully the 1st nail in Chelsea’s coffin guys. 1:0 to West Ham.
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Matic sent off!
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Moano sent to stands preceded during the half by another staff.
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Chelsea really are a bunch of thugs. Why do they always have to go mob-handed on the referee and linesman. Stupid foul by Matic – clear second yellow – nothing to complain about. And despite Terry trying to tell them to get away from the ref, they still go back. Fabregas and terry booked for their troubles.
José’s “the world is against me and Chelsea” attitude infects the players with a victim mentality. Loathsome bunch. I’m so glad that ball was only 98% over the line. LMFAO.
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Carroll heads home ’78. 2-1.
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I wonder how José found the view from up there. Maybe he’ll try the “weak and naive” line again at his press conference.
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Arsenal team to face Everton: Cech, Bellerin, Koscielny, Gabriel, Monreal, Coquelin, Cazorla, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Ozil, Alexis, Giroud
Arsenal substitutes: Macey, Chambers, Debuchy, Gibbs, Flamini, Walcott, Campbell
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FOX Soccer @FOXSoccer 1h1 hour ago
Sky reports that Mourinho tried to make his way into the referee’s room at the break, which is off-limits, and was ejected. More to follow.
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Tom Clarke @clarkey101 19h19 hours ago
Remember when some Arsenal fans wanted to buy Michu for £30m? Amazing. Now he’s in the Spanish 4th division.
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Sounds like José was trying to show his players that he’s just as dumb as them.
They were on top against WH at the beginning of the second half, got the goal, then settled for the draw. Dumb and dumber.
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reprots that joe say refused to do the after match press conference(we can but hope he has already been sacked)
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Arsenal Community @AFCCommunity 1h1 hour ago
Arsenal legend @LeeDixon2 has just been to officially open the new disabled supporters lounge! #ArsenalforEveryone
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Ah, I see Masons first job was to book Coq for nowt.
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unusually AFC have been getting on the end of our corners so far, but Giroud and Gabriel (2) have failed to get headers on target.
yes Ranetta, Mason if he gets a chance will send the lad off, seeing as what happened the last time he reffed us(Crystal Palace)
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so far Oxlade-chamberlain is not looking like a guy about to grab his chance for a regular spot in Ramsey’s absence
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Our defenders have had most of our best chances this half. As I suspected we might need to be a little patient.
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Ox bound to be a little off the pace. I’m sure he’ll come good.
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35 minutes a delightful ball in from Ozil and Giroud with a lovely glancing header makes it 1-0
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Mesut Ozil take a bow.Lovely finish from Larry but he could not have asked for a better pass.
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2-0
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37 minutes, Cazorla freekick in and Koscielny heads home – 2-0
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Wow.
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one minute thirty six seconds between the scoring of the two goals
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Look at Alexis in the left back slot. Wonderful.
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Everton could’ve had 2 yellows by now.
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43 minutes ox loses the ball on edge of Everton area, who break and Barkley shot deflects off Gabriel to wrong foot Cech, 2-1.
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Pity. Ox should’ve passed to right when in penalty box but instead tried to shoot. Ball was blocked dead, played upfield, Everton scored.
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a dive from delafaou goes totally unpunished by the ref, the lad even complained about not getting a free kick, awful by Mason.
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Actually, typical from Mason, edu, but yes, “awful”.
I’ve seen this guys 2nd halls before.
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2nd half’s
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A shame as I know the defence would have been desperate to keep another clean sheet but it was a freak goal, a deflection like that; could have gone anywhere. The referee has been awful, other than the goal we’ve been fine. We need to get another goal – not because we can’t keep it to 2 – 1 but because I want Ox to score it. The lad needs a boost to his confidence.
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I’ve just had a quick look around Arsenal web world and its amazing to see the Ramsey boo boys bigging up AOC’s performance, anything from quality to man of the match contender seems to be the theme from them, there really is something mentally wrong with a section of AFC supporters.
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good run and pass by ox, howard saves from alexis
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