I usually start a new season brimming with a blend of optimism and ludicrous over confidence. I assume we’ll win every game, a delusion I maintain right up until the first dropped points when I cheerfully downgrade my expectations to an unbeaten season. After the first defeat I shrug and assume we’ll just win every competition in which we compete. And so on until the conclusion of the campaign.
It’s a happy and harmless approach to my hobby, doesn’t hurt anyone and put simply means I always hope for the best of all possible outcomes. If that ends up meaning fourth place or a Europa league position or just avoiding relegation then that’s what I’ll be cheering for at the death.
Not this time though. Having been stung by the season which followed the World Cup I watched in horror as the Euros dragged on to see all those Arsenal players not getting a break, not resting and recharging. I realised that this would be a difficult season. Now it seems that we will not only have to catch up after a slow start but also assimilate all sorts of new faces into the squad, which, when allied to the inevitable injuries ( a knock on effect of the international bullshit we all had to endure) simply means disruption and disjointed performances.
So when I saw the result of our opening fixture I was as angry as everybody else, but not surprised. Not angry at or with any individual just at the entire wasteful, pointless distraction of those international matches. I was told by many of you to try to enjoy them. I was gently chided for wishing Wales would lose at the first hurdle because it must be nice for Aaron to do so well. I can only assume those gentle chiders are deeply regretting their position now. I’d happily sacrifice his summer of fun for a prolonged healthy season with Arsenal where he could enjoy lifting a trophy at the end. Success with Wales or success with the club which actually pay his wages. He’d be happy either way wouldn’t he?
Anyway it is what it is and with the hateful circus of the transfer window at long last beginning to pack up its tent perhaps we can get back to real football. Perhaps my return from the muddy wastes of the North Somerset coast will coincide with the return of Wengerball. Stranger things have happened. Maybe the stutter against Liverpool and the blunt if resolute performance against Leicester were simply the prologue. Maybe we turn the page to chapter one this afternoon at 3pm.
Historically Watford versus Arsenal always produces a decisive result. Well, almost always. Of the twenty four matches between the two teams only one has ended in a draw. We have won every Premier League game ever played against them, their shock FA Cup victory at the Emirates back in March was their first win against us since 1988. Normal service was resumed a couple of weeks later with a resounding victory built on Iwobi’s effervescence, Alexis’ sharpness and a Coquelin / Elneny midfield axis which kept the ball moving and denied Watford almost any meaningful possession.
I will happily settle for more of the same today: Fast, fearless and inventive in possession, fierce, decisive and tireless in defence. Sounds like the perfect recipe doesn’t it? Whether we can produce such a display after a difficult first couple of games remains to be seen and whether I’m allowed to watch any of it with Liz’s birthday barbecue happening in the house and garden is a similarly moot point. The lack of Arsenal fans or even football fans on her guest list suggests it will be a big ask. Luckily enough my dogs are deeply antisocial so if I position them in the doorway to my room I might manage to go undisturbed for the requisite couple of hours.
As with Arsenal it could all come down to how much I want it, how far I’m prepared to go to get what I want and how well I can ignore the catcalls and anger of the baying crowd who little understand the pressures I’ll be operating under. They can all go hungry if it means I get to see a couple of halves of vintage or even near vintage Wengerball. I’ll face the music afterwards and take my punishment like a man.
Anyway time for the proper football blog. After last season where I sometimes strayed so far from the facts and indeed any mention of the game that I could have been auditioning for a job on the Daily Mirror, it has been made abundantly clear that readers come to football blogs for predictions, selections and wisdom with which the common herd is not blessed. I shall endeavour to give the people what they so desire.
I predict a tight game with either lots of goals or no goals or at least not many goals and a win for either the home or away side with a draw also a possibility. The Arsenal squad will feature the likes of Ozil, Cech, Cazorla, Xhaka, Bellerin, Giroud and Alexis among others, and many if not all of these will play in certain positions on the pitch. There will be a referee who will be deemed a bastard to either the visitors or the home side at various times, unless you are Andy Nic in which case you’ve probably got his autograph and photo on your bedroom wall. Arsenal will play defensively, keeping it tight and quieting the home crowd or will attack furiously like drunken Mongolian horseman with a point to prove. There will be a moment of controversy.
I hope you enjoy the game, it promises to be one.
Positively Arsenal 
Good morning Stew, the breeezes of the Bristol Channel have clearly stimulated the appetite. As last week I fancy goals, goals, goals today so I cannot be wrong twice. And as you mention it our main match official today is Mr Friend. I cant see him having a busy afternoon.
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Well, I’m of to London to see my mum. I will take a few hours off to watch the game at public screening at the Emirates. I hope to witness a resounding win for AFC. I expect to enjoy such a win. We are getting stronger with every game. Properly resting players will pay us dividends. Enjoy your barbecue, Steww. Vegan barbecue?
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Morning Andy – you have so much to learn about the art of prediction. Make it vague, leave it open to interpretation, hedge those bets.
GP we have two BBQ’s – the throwbacks will be cooking their hormone laced water pumped cruelty rich slices of infant corpses on coal and I will prepare a dazzling variety of innovative, flavourful, light and exciting plant based foods on my trusty gas beast.
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Finally the season proper gets underway with the traditional pre-match PA scene-setting, appetite-whetting smorgasbord of painting with words, some of it about the actual football. Welcome back to the fray (or should that be fry), Stew. Hard to imagine the outcome of the upcoming stress and excitement of what should prove to be a barbecue of two halves but my money is on the plucky vegan grill to more than hold its own.
And Arsenal to win 0-3.
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I sometime feel Stew has rebuked me without mentioning me. That’s of course either because I feel everything is about me, or Stew has the wonderful ability to make us all feel like he is addressing us directly.
Quite right about everything too Stew.
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So good to have you back Stew. Did you use your break to finish the book? Now for a Gooner goal fest.
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what a write up or not depending on your opinion or agenda, welcome back Steww.
I did think, when I first looked at the fixture list, it would be a struggle leading up to the first international break because of all the problems Steww has listed above. not so much in the know as know it all eh. obviously i was thinking we might scrap wins and muddle our way through to keep in touch until we could be in a position to concerntrate on performances rather than just results. So today is already being lined up as a “must win” by some and although we’ve had good news on the injury and transfer front this week a win might quiet down, even for a while, those black cloud supporters.
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scrape wins, not scrap
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2-1 win today
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Can only agree on the Euros….a couple of teams exceeded expectations, but generally, a shit show of abysmal quality, right up to the final
Know it won’t happen but wish our players would just retire from international football…..what do the majority get out of it….apart from sponsorships etc. wouldn’t be surprised if working with Wenger earns Perez a Spain cap to add to the list.
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mandy you do know that a player can not retire from international football without the agreement of the international manager. If selected a player must attend, and if he refuses he can be suspended for the same number of clubs games as international games he refuses to attend. his club can also be fined.
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I feel like you’re pushing against the outer limit’s of football sanity here. Any more and you will be too damn sane for the game.
My now sister-in-law once said to me, as I writhed in football-pain after a bad result : ‘why can’t you be happy for the other team? someone has to lose [was too stunned by her ravings to explain draws to her], after all. This week it’s your team, but at least someone’s happy.’ Clearly, a maniac.
I think I managed to muster a feeble , ‘you don’t understand’
Anyway, be careful. Real deal, continuous positivity and cheerfulness as a modern football fan (who doesn’t follow PSG or Bayern)- I salute you but it seems a dangerous path.
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I just posted this over on arseblog, – well once it passes moderation of course –
if there is one manager out there that does not do panic signings its Wenger, he will not bend to fan or media pressure. He does the deals he can when he can, and no amount of articles or whinging will make him sign players. But of course he is damned if he does and damned if he doesn’t, as clearly shown by the reaction to his latest foray into the transfer market. Media, bloggers and certain fans have shown us that it don’t matter what he does, they will find fault.
So is every player bought by any club from now till the end of the window a “panic” signing, seeing as they were not bought in the first month of the window, that is the inference, or is is just Arsenal that get this special treatment. I suppose we should not blame the media for doing it, after all Arsenal fans and blogs are only too willing to indulge in attacking our club at every given chance, real or perceived, it don’t matter to some.
Arseblog you wonder why we did not do what we wanted to do earlier in the window, of course you know some of the reasons, but it does not make for clicks if one acknowledges something as well known as Vardy deciding he would stay loyal to LCFC, no lets imply that something is seriously wrong at Arsenal and that an ” internal enquiry” is needed. God forbid that an Arsenal blog would miss any chance to have a silly dig at the club. While we are at it why not imply that Arsenal have done many “panic” signings in the past, after all isn’t that the theme we want to push, but you really missed the big one, the biggest “panic” signing of all Arsenal panic signings, Mesut Ozil, late deal on transfer deadline day, at club record fee, how much more panic can a panic signing be. Isn’t that the angle being pushed after all.
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Being a deeply contrary individual of course I enjoy international football and the Euros and the World Cup I am a virtual slave to. My productivity during the tournaments reduces by at least 50%. I would however have to admit that as club football has come to dominate football, and those exotic geniuses you might have seen only every four years are now a weekly menu item the attraction is less. I also think the increase in the number of finalists, and therefore the length of the tournaments has been detrimental. Even by semi final stage every side looks knackered..
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A more important question, what on earth is a vegan doing with a BBQ?
The face might explain it.
Top stuff Stew, as always.
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Welcome back steww – it was worth it for this one gem:
“There will be a referee who will be deemed a bastard to either the visitors or the home side at various times, unless you are Andy Nic in which case you’ve probably got his autograph and photo on your bedroom wall.”
It made me chuckle!
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Watford beat us at our own place and knocked us out of the FA cup.
They are no mugs, yet firing their manager was a very strange move.
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Lovely stuff Stew,we’ll win today.
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Positively Arsenal @Blackburngeorge 44m44 minutes ago Blackburn, England
If the versions Theo 2012, Ramsey 13, Alexis 14 and Ozil 15 turn up, we will walk the league.
I like to dream you know?
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a line from Wenger yesterday discussing our transfer business this summer, or likely business, re xhaka, and mustafi, he pointed out both were their club captains last season, what was that about arsenal needing leaders, but the bloggers would rather write about per being an non playing club captain, than all the players we have who have captained teams in their careers.
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Well regular service has been resumed. I for one am a happy bunny. Sometimes Steww sounds so pissed off by the annual merry-go-round, the constant b.s. that is used to wind-up the sheeple into thinking that football is all about how much you spend, that I fear he might just throw the towel-in and quit. The fact that he hasn’t and has the the writing chops to make the football fun and reveal the journos and bloggers as frauds is all to our gain. Welcome back Steww and 1-nil to the Arsenal.
PS: I couldn’t help myself at the end there. Lol.
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Beautiful as always, Stew.
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Greater fitness levels combined with increased frequency of matches in order to help the broadcasters pay off some of that money that they are paying to the leagues means that such clusterf*cks are now apart of modern sports like football and cricket.
The standard of the football across the league at the start of this season has therefore been consequently lower then it should be but you or I won’t hear the 24/7 plundits highlight the negative impact of it all for the paying punter, nope, they’re too busy trolling gullible AFC fans for easy kicks and clicks.
In cricket international tournaments have been degraded as players and their coaches realise that they can’t be overplaying their players to the detriment of the team.
The same will eventually happen with football, though as Eddy points out FUFA have one over the clubs for the time being – therefore clubs have to rely on their squads.
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If less fit athletes playing in a slightly less intense league albeit in less comfortable conditions and climates with poorer diets etc would benefit with a summer off to recharge then I imagine that someone who is pushing their body even more as modern athletes do, plus all the extra traveling etc they’ll be in need of a rest.
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Dis either or type prediction is d best yet. U can’t go wrong. LOL
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The biggest problem with the whole transfer window bollocks is that it closes after the season starts, or that there is a window at all:
The only winners from such an arrangement are the agents.
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.
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Welcome back to writing ways.. enjoyed reading dat
Expecting loads of goals as d team clicks
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Happily Tottenumb looking surprisingly poor after an hour at the Lane of Pain. Liverpool lively and one-up so far. Game on a knife edge but Scousers look the more likely to win.
Surely Spuds weren’t a one-season wonder last year …
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Top work Mr Black, and a vague sense of order being restored, although it won’t be until later in September that things finally fall into place. I always feel the timing of the first international break and the closure of the transfer window is for the fan the equivalent of a child receiving a present with no batteries.
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with Ox and Theo liking to come inside if difficult to see where the width will come from today even from the bench, flying spaniads at the back will be important today. COYG
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TEAM NEWS: OZIL STARTS
Mesut Ozil has been handed his first start of the season for Arsenal’s trip to Watford.
Arsène Wenger continues with the partnership of Laurent Koscielny and Rob Holding in central defence, with Santi Cazorla lining up alongside Granit Xhaka in midfield.
Alexis once again leads the forward line, flanked by Theo Walcott and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain.
Francis Coquelin drops to the bench, where he is joined by Jack Wilshere and Olivier Giroud.
Arsenal team: Cech, Bellerin, Holding, Koscielny, Monreal, Cazorla, Xhaka, Walcott, Ozil, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Alexis
Arsenal substitutes: Ospina, Chambers, Gibbs, Coquelin, Elneny, Wilshere, Giroud
Copyright 2016 The Arsenal Football Club plc. Permission to use quotations from this article is granted subject to appropriate credit being given to http://www.arsenal.com as the source
Read more at http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/20160827/team-news-ozil-starts#gPc1Ah4cLC5A2D98.99
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Harry Kane keeps up his record of never having scored a goal in August
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why the fuck are we not wearing our red and white kit
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First time I’ve seen young Rob Holding . Impressed.
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Andy Nic’s mate doing a fine job so far.
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And boy has Xhaka got a pass on him!
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Mesut looks a little ring rusty. As one might expect.
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missed the game so far, how are we playing
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who scored for us
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Alexis very good today.
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Santi with a pen for the first, we are so far too slick for these Hornets
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Eddy – Alexis. Fine cross from Theo.
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thank God for technology, Alexis makes it 2-0 from a walcott cross, a bit of a miss hit shot from Alexis, but a goal is a goal
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They’ve threatened a couple of times – Cech very good save from wild Kos deflection but we look good.
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Cazorla penalty and Alexis, Ed
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Gareth Crooks says the Alexis goal is world class, outstanding cross by walcott, and a brilliant lifted finish by Alexis
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Oops. Didn’t realise a response had been posted to Eddy’s question. Blame it on the abysmal Internet I have to deal with over here.
Oh well
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As I see Theo or Walcott working so hard on the wings I remember the Sage of Dublin agitating daily until recently for him to be sold.
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Theo looking so sharp yet again. Despite being written off by our own supporters.
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Beeeeeeeaaautiful goal by Özil. Lovely
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