50 Comments

The @Bradyesque7 Weekly Round Up

Hello and welcome to this week’s round-up and what a week it has been.

A fire has been reignited around Ashburton Grove and it’s largely being fuelled by deadwood.

First up we’ll look at the furore that arose when our good friends in the media decided to create the team news ahead of the Bayern game. The cannon, along with the travelling fans, were to be disrespected as any player who gave us a fighting chance would be dropped. Szczesny, Vermaelen, Walcott and Cazorla would all join the list of possibly feigned injuries and not make the trip to Munich. Arsene came out and explained why the keeper would be left at home, he has gone mental, but what of the others? Why were we being denied our chance at victory in Bavaria? WHY?

Some news that wasn’t complete fiction was Jack Wilshere’s injury. It is believed that he will miss three weeks of football, which is just enough time for Wenger to get his way and guarantee that we finish below our neighbours who are obviously romping home to victory.

So the reserves went off to face the mighty Germans without a hope of restoring some dignity to the camp. Walcott absence made his assist for Giroud all the more impressive. It was five minutes in and suddenly the no-hopers had a shot. The game was fairly even until five minutes from the end when Koscielny made it 2-0 on the night. The push was too late and we were out. Bloody embarrassing!

olivier-giroud-v-bayern

So the media had been mistaken. Santi and Theo very much did take part in the historical European tie but one unexplained omission was that of our captain. Talk is now of the Arsenal armband claiming its latest victim with Vermaelen’s agent said to be engineering a way out of the club for his client. It is rumoured that the feeling is mutual and we never really liked him anyway so there!

Next up was the European hangover. The manager continued his policy of throwing games before they started by introducing Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain to the starting line up. Aaron Ramsey was left out and Gervinho was on the bench so fall-guy duties fell on the brittle shoulders of Abou Diaby. We didn’t take the lead for 74 minutes and Abou should be ashamed. Fortunately, Wenger found time to check his twitter page and see that the Diaby experiment was not working. He was hooked and a couple of scapegoats that we know and love were introduced. The first goal came but only served to highlight our inherent defencive weaknesses. Nacho’s feeble attempt at blocking his own shot failed and the ball trickled over the line. 1-0 to the Arsenal. Then our mortally challenged timbers combined to seal victory and the three points were ours. Ramsey found Gervinho on a counter attack and the Ivorian slalom skier slotted home with ease.

Swansea City v Arsenal - Premier League-1768220

Per Mertesacker came out after the games to talk about the new perspective the defence had found. He attributed the new-found solidity and two clean sheets to watching tapes of their performances. A technique pioneered in the early 1950s and later mastered by Scotch Video Tapes. Re-record not fade away.

A deeply embittered saboteur also spoke about the fantastic attitude of his team. With just nine games to go, this will have a serious impact on the longest running case of espionage ever to hit the modern game. Wenger added: “We defended high up the pitch and nothing. I play Fabianski and nothing. This team’s mental strengths are now a little bit stronger than my handbrake”.

And finally! FIFA have decided that, in the most exciting part of the season, there should be a break up for some of those gripping international games we all love. England will be without Wilshere and therefore excitement while Ireland take on Montenegro. Whichever country you’re from will play in some boring game that is only distracting from what matters. Arsenal!

Remember to come back to Positively Arsenal, the best place to find no coverage of this week’s internationals.

That’s it for this week. Thanks for reading.

Up the Arsenal!

50 comments on “The @Bradyesque7 Weekly Round Up

  1. This is superb.

    Line of the day already:
    “A fire has been reignited around Ashburton Grove and it’s largely being fuelled by deadwood.”

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  2. perfect summary of the week with tongue firmly in cheek, much egg on many faces brilliant to see. nice to see a fall goal with giroud Ramsey and gerv all involved. Without- doubt its team performances and the brilliance of our manager and staff which will get us through to a successful end to the season and not the plastic fans idea of their favourite individuals

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  3. I have carried his forward from yesterday
    We are appreciated when found
    ” DownUnderGooner March 19, 2013 at 2:20 am Edit

    Brilliant article and amazing comments. Good to see there are still some rational, passionate supporters around. Am i right in saying alot of you guys used to post on aclf? Seems they need you back, its become le-groan lite!!! Form is temporary, class is permanent. Keep the faith”

    I am almost certain the “class”referred to is me.

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  4. Oh ,and HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    Great stuff Ronan.

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  5. Up the ARSENAL indeed. Thanks for the write up. I hadn’t laughed so hard in a long time. So has WOJO gone completely mental or is there still some hope.
    Come to think of it we had a keeper who was normally mental and he wasn’t that bad after all. We should hope WOJO goes all the way mental . World class type mental.

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  6. Welcome to sanity and positivista frame of mind DOWN UNDER GOONER.
    is that how you spell it PG. Or GP.

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  7. Is RONAN Brady’s right foot..???

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  8. Pre-Munich I begged the team to give B-7 something positive to write about. Could I be more pleased. Add the Spuds, the gift that that never stops giving, and my week was almost perfect.

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  9. Aye B7 it has been a grim grim week in Goonerdom – made all the more unbearable by the old WHL wobble on Sunday

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  10. One additional comment – Among the deadwood igniting Ashburton Grove is none other than Abou Diaby. Once again our very own self-opinionated fans have decided to hound this player out of the club because he dared return to the team after a short (by his standards) injury break. Obviously rusty and not fully up to speed, there was a near melt-down on Twitter carried over into post game blogs (except PA of course). The vehemence and mean spirited display had nothing to do with his performance. P.I.M.P made the point:
    “Diaby won all 3/3 of his tackles, plus 3 interceptions, 1/1 header, 1/1 clearances and 4/5 take-ons. 89% pass success. Better than u think.”
    Aman of the Tactics Column at Arseblog made this observation:
    “As the half wore on, however, Diaby got better and showed glimpses of what type of player he could be for Arsenal, driving forward, winning the ball back (which he did 6 times, the most of all the Arsenal players) and released the ball quicker. But Diaby stuck out because his decision-making wasn’t quite as good as his team-mates around him. Once he gets that right, it could make all the difference.”
    You would hope that our fans would have learnt from past errors in prematuredly disparaging and dismissing injured players like Van Traitor and Rosicky by simply giving them the benefit of the doubt and and a supportive voice. At the minimum acknowledgr that Arsene knows best..

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  11. @ goonerkam at 9:36 am

    That’s the correct spelling 😃

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  12. Very funny, bradyesqe. I love your style.

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  13. Great stuff number 7!,really enjoyed that-your much better than that other well known Ronan.

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  14. Ah the curse of Mickey Thomas strikes again – thought you were clever Appleton didn’t you ?

    Well you aint larfing now

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  15. Great read really enjoyedit

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  16. Wow! Great job. Made my day.
    The deadwood line was hilarious, almost read past it before getting it.
    Gervinho is about the only striker ready to dribble past defenders. If only he improves his finishing…

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  17. “Fortunately, Wenger found time to check his twitter page and see that the Diaby experiment was not working.” Hahaha! Brilliant. Great read, as usual.

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  18. ” Walcott absence made his assist for Giroud all the more impressive.”

    HA HA HA!!

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  19. wonderful round up, love the humour !! …the ivorian slalom skier..ha..

    and welcome to all the new positivistas.

    2 weeks without arsenal will be very tough but at least we wont have to deal with idiots debating the temperature of the water in the showers and how much money the club spends for electricity … wenger has a lot to answer for surely ….

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  20. Hunter, funny!
    Thinking about it, if the club let the players shower in cold water we could haved used the money saved on the electricity to keep RVP at the club, innit?

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  21. yes paul -n absolutely , i mean i have written an official letter to the club demanding information on the accounts about how much we pay gunnersaurus …i dont see him contributing with goals and assists….total waste…

    next on i will demand to see the bills and invoices of the lawnmowers…do we outsource? if yes then why? cant we find a kid or two that can do it for free and release money for the manager to get radomel ?…

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  22. Shotta, Walcott has become a whipping boy again. How people can have a go at Diaby is beyond me. Diaby, like most players needs a run of matches to get right. The young man is top class.

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  23. Great piece, B7! Made me smile at the end of an already fantastic week. Unfortunately, now it’s time for two weeks of boredom:

    So I will hope that firstly, none of our players get injured during those two weeks of nothingness, and secondly, that no one in the Sp*rs camp realises that they haven’t, in fact, won the World Cup, Superbowl and the Ashes when they beat us a couple of weeks ago. Because, so far, they seem to be still busy celebrating instead of playing football. Long may it continue! If the boys keep it up, we are so going to grab that 3rd spot.

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  24. Uh-Oh. Better make sure Hunter doesn’t see the the electric bill for the pitch lights:

    Football pitches, who needs football pitches. Have you lot never been to Old Trafford? (I haven’t! Praise be to the football gods)

    As for Doris, the tea lady will be the first against the wall when the bin bags begin their revolt.

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  25. ts ts ts fins i wonder who approved the funding for this mars project … i know we are posh but im sure nasa could have gone on with their project at cape canaveral, why our ground ? and who paid for those astronauts in the stands taking notes with their digital equipment ?

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  26. EVIL
    most importantly for the guys to come back uninhabitable.
    FINS
    HAHAHA on old turdford park pitch.

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  27. It’s Arsene Hunter. He’s taking us backwards. All the way back.
    Back to the enlightened rage of the Pulisites.

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  28. Paul-N at 2:40 pm
    What a gwaan blood? America killin me wid work my yute but I have to enjoy my Arsenal.
    I am sure you meant “Diaby has become the whipping boy again.” By his own damn fans. But you have to big-up B-7 for for making fun of the foolishness.
    What would we do without Positive Arsenal?

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  29. i dotn know fins …… perhaps arsene took clough way too seriously with his “god would have put the grass in the heavens” line of his and is making sure he completes brian’s wish….after all the humans down here dont want football,,they want a modern colloseum.

    arsene clearly influenced by jodi foster and the movie “contact” there …

    madness i say …..a pitch in the heavens ? …the arsenal stadium ? ..in heaven ? ..step aside kubrick , step aside tarkowski, step aside nasa, you too russians… you are all too small to grasp the vision of the wenger ….

    ehe its interlull we might as well talk some bollocks to kill the time.. 🙂 dont hurt anyone .. lol ..

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  30. On the topic of Diaby, a piece from a recent blog on 7amkickoff: “At one point (in the second half) Diaby turned his defender and dribbled straight at us away fans, his touch let him down and the ball went out of play. The away fans let him have it, his head dropped and when he jogged back to the center circle. I couldn’t help but feel we are witnessing the last few games of a broken man. Broken physically by a Dan Smith tackle and broken mentally by the demands of the Arsenal fans.”

    And that from the away fans… disgraceful.

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  31. Nice, B7 – in fact, your best yet!

    Onwards and upwards …

    Talking of which, it’s nearly time for Stew Black on the Radio – check it out people, always a top top way to spend two hours of a Tuesday night.

    He’ll be tucked away somewhere feverishly rewriting his spontaneous ad libs …

    http://www.somervalleyfm.co.uk/audio.html

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  32. evil what did you expect ? the fans demands are not something to listen to anyway…fans will always be ridiculous.. ..i mean we have arsenal fans doubting wenger…how could diabby escape ? lol ..

    im reading some fans of ours and how they aint convinced from fabianski…”he didnt make any saves did he?” ..the fact fabianski was screaming like a psychotic focused lunatic in germany to keep control of his area and encourage his defenders ….(what weve been missing)…the VOCAL authority that will do it with conviction and raise the rest around him has been something that allured our fans.

    szcezhny is fantastic and has many years ahead of him to develop even further…noone signed a contract with him that he will be first team regular from his early twenties…

    plus its a bit ridiculous to expect a teenager to scream at the late-twenties pertesarker.

    casillas had a certain hierro in front of him till he manned up. won a few important titles before having the confidence irdering everyone else…stature is important.
    buffon is a freak……by far the best i have ever seen…..and not szhezny not fabianski nobody can reach him

    they say szcezhny is good at reflexes…i disagree ..he is brave in one on ones that makes it look as if he made a reflective save when all he has done is make himself as big as possible so that ball ricoches off him. it is of course an important quality but in the situations where he has to set up a wall i crap myself cause i know that if the ball goes the other way szcezhny will make the rainbow dive instead of darting to the corner ( high or low i dont care..thats what reflxes are for…right?). so what reflexes are we talking about ? for a keeper as tall as schezhny goals conceeded like youngs and rooneys in that horrible day indicate that though big and tall he is actually slow in his executions of his decissions.

    not only are our fans stupid they also want to talk about subjects and debate hours upon hours on matters they clearly have no knoweldge or experience in . not even the basics…

    i think both our keepers have come from the lech poznan polish school of goalkeepers and they aint mugs there…neither is wenger who knows where to search for what he wants.

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  33. “for a keeper as tall as szczesny goals conceded like youngs and rooneys in that horrible day indicate that though big and tall he is actually slow in his executions of his decisions.”

    That is something I had noticed a while back hunter as I often sit behind the goal at home. But when I mentioned it I was shot down as he ‘was’ very popular at the time. Fabianski has always been very sharp – I was at the game of the double-save against Wigan. His problems have mostly been mental, so I would be very pleased for him if he has overcome this. Sczczesny has time and talent on his side and will get there with patience.

    Evil, I am not sure that Diaby will be broken by the fan reaction – what he has come through to still be playing shows tremendous mental strength – Arsene has commented on how tough he is. He is also very intelligent and very religious so I doubt the views of a few hundred ‘fans’ is going to derail him. There are others who need that external validation more, but I get the sense that he is not one. Besides, having seen his facebook page, he has plenty of fans there making positive comments to counter-balance that negativity.

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  34. How many times do players have to say it before the message hits home? It’s just a shame that not everyone enjoys the same support!

    http://www.arsenal.com/news/news-archive/cazorla-fans-have-been-spectacular

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  35. oh yes pas when i watch him trying to save set pieces and his body and arms arch like a rainbow i freak out…it reminds me of almunia.. however his spirit and jacks is what arsenal needs..plus ramsey’s work ethic … they are all examplary so far.

    ramsey is becoming my favourite i have to say …sure he delays on the ball some times..but he is still what? 21? 22? ..lol…so young ….id make him captain in the future..for his ethos and what he went through and of course for the spirit and belief he showed when giroud got the first one in munich…top lad aaron ! jack will be targetted and as captain he will have to react he will love to get involved too ….looks the feisty type..

    aaron for captain and all the doomers vomiting inside their t-shirts 🙂

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  36. all the doomers vomiting inside their t-shirts

    Hardy har

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  37. a bit off but i thot some1 here wouold know what happened tp henri lansbury?

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  38. He got sold to Nottingham Forest TS. I’m not sure how he’s getting on now though.

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  39. Excellent Stuff B7.

    AA, just saw your reminder re steww show. listening to last half hour or so, will do utmost to catch it all next week.

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  40. Henri is doing quite well

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  41. @hunter Aaron for captain one day? You know that gets my vote!

    Highly recommend listening to Stew’s show. I did today, when the stream would cooperate. Tweet him you’re listening and he’ll give you a mention; especially if you’re from someplace exotic. Like Alabama.

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  42. Nice writeup Bradyesque.

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  43. I was just reading another Arsenal website this morning and a guest poster on said website said the funniest thing – he thinks Ramsey is not that great and a squad player “at best” – LOL!

    I stopped reading then, because the author is obviously crazy.

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  44. It doesn’t need to be said, but if the tackle on Ryo had even been called a foul (which it certainly was) then would the Wigan player McManaman have steamed in like that? Ryo came on for an injured McManaman in that game last week. The answer of course is probably no.

    The FA is most definitely not fit for purpose. We all know that.

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  45. &

    In other news the Bahrain based owners of Leeds Leeds Leeds (not the dudes shooting and locking up doctors and the like on that troubled island? Surely not!) have decided to put the club up for sale three months after buying it. We’d best move along now, nothing to see there.

    Blackburn Rovers after the successful mob lynching of a previous manager by a section of their fans who obviously know the Game have now moved onto their seventh manager this season. Yup, that’s right number seven!

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  46. *coughs*
    That’d be the third manager to leave Blackburn this season. They are moving on to manager number four, which is marginally less ridiculous then number seven.
    My bad. Time to go and find some coffee.

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